time frame

[luckyclovertat]

my husband has a very heavy drinking problem. he can not function or even sleep through the night without getting up to drink a beer. he tried hospital treatment two years ago and was told when he left after 2 weeks ( his choice) that his liver was very bad and if he continued to drink he might have between 2-4 years. needless to say he went back to drinking. he has lost so much weight he is skin and bones itchy skin all the time food does not process, always tired, but cant sleep unless he is passed out some swelling in stomach and feet extreme swelling, enlarged veins in his arms and legs, high blood pressure extreme mood swings, angry for no reason and he refuses to go to the doctors or get help so i am left to just wait and watch. anybody with any knowledge of a time frame of how long he can go on like this please reply. thanks

[luckyclovertat]

he has been in three hospitals in the last 4 years and always goes back to drinking, it starts getting worse at this time of year, and i dont think he wants help anymore the doctors have told him everything u said, i have tried and so have our children. sadly with his drinking and on again off again employment, medical and hospital bills we are now in bankruptcy. when i tried to leave him he tried to kill his self. i feel stuck watching him kill him self slowly and just waiting for the sad end. but thank you for your reply

[luckyclovertat]

thank u for ur comments. i am pretty sure he has given up he did not have a pretty childhood his father was abusive and drank too much too. his mom left him with his father when he was 9 so i know that has alot to do with it but he refuses to get help, i feel like i am just waiting for it to end. again thanks

[AmyLC]

I really have to give you immense credit for living and watching your husband live like this.  To answer your question - NOT LONG.  He should have quit yesterday.  He cannot go on like this and since he isn't taking care of himself, he needs some kind of intervention or sadly, he will die.  The body can only take so much abuse and that is the cycle he is in on a daily basis.  It must be hard for you, I don't know how you do it.  The best thing you can do for him is get his B hind into a rehab, actually a detox center 1st.  At this point, he will have extreme withdrawl if he stops drinking thats why he drinks all the time because it's uncomfortable when he doesn't drink.  (cold sweats, chills, the shakes, anxiety, increased heart rate).  
If I were you, since he wont get help on his own and he is dying before your eyes, get a few family members or his close friends (more people have more of an impact) and sit the man down and tell him the facts (those being that 1.  he is going to die living like this 2. you love him 3. you refuse to watch him die like this).  Usually when people are confronted by loved ones they respect and care about, they willingly will agree to get help.  You know what people are close enough to be helpful to him and understanding of his situation.  Pack his suitcase beforehand so all you have to do is get up and leave before he changes his mind.  Know where you are taking him and contact the detox center prior to his arrival.  - that's what needs to happen because he cannot detox at home alone, it's too dangerous and he cannot continue living this way.  He needs another person to step in and help him, because he's not going to help himself.  Hope my words are helpful to you.

[TheLightSeeker]

Hey luckyclovertat.
Welcome to the forum.
I can sense your feeling of helpnessness and frustration.
You need to go to Al Anon meetings.
If you have teen age kids  there are Al Anon/teen meetings as well.
You need healing from this.
Your husband may be beyond any possibility of getting better.
Deep inside he's given up perhaps. Maybe that is his contract in this life.
Who knows?
No one knows how long this will go on.
I've come across people that lived for decades in similar situations.
In medical terms, he is at a high risk.

His cardiovascular,lymphatic,digestive, G.I. systems are dysfunctional
at best at this point. His mental and psychological health is affected greatly from nutritional deficiencies and neurons dying off at an ongoing
basis
The only hope that I can offer you is the hope of
.a divine intervention.
Go out and connect with traditional healers, shamans and spiritual people that have reached higher levels of awarenss and consciousness.
Remember that all this is from within. We are all part of this Oneness that
connects us. It has everything and anything that has to do with creation
and healing.
Pray, meditate and see your husband as the soul and spirit he is ,away from the influence and effects of alcohol
God Bess you all!
Nikodicreta