Very Confused

[Murphyslaw1970]

I had a repetative dream as a child for a period of about 6 years. I used to call it my telephone dream. I have only just remembered it due to discussions about childhood trauma..My "dream" has absolutely no images, pictures, symbols or recognizable sound, I seem to recall hearing fluid as though I was in a pool, or hearing my blood move through my body (creepy)...nothing but color, almost like the aurora borialis, My body is moving or the sensation of my body (I don't see it) is rything rythmically making me feel sick...I always feel the same sensation, I recall thinking I needed help..I feel myself reaching out for something (again seeing nothing, not even my my hand) but I know I'm reaching out and try to pick up a telephone book... the sensation is warped and lessens until it is gone,,,,needing help from this "book" is the only clear thought I experience, other than feeling sick.. I have no sense of time and often woke up feeling sick to the point of needing to vomit. It felt like an acid trip ( I only ever did that garbage 1 time in my earky 20's) got sick then too!!! Can anyone shed light on my experience. I am in need of clarity.

[Murphyslaw1970]

Thank-you for your feedback...:)

[missdoxology]

I am guessing you had disfunction in your family when you were a kid.  I am thinking it was around 10 or 12....Around that time in your life you are aware that something is wrong.  You are powerless to do anything about it. Kids usually develop a tummy ache when they have stress especially when they are unable to express into words what is troubling.  I imagine that the telephone book represents two things, that you needed someone important or in authority to help and also that whatever isor was  troublesome isor was a heavy/overwhelming load (big phone book) not knowing where to look for that help.  Maybe the queasy feelings came from emotional changes that occur when you are going thru puberty, your hormones really can cause queasy feelings along with stress.  I think perhaps in your dream state you are hoping for help, but as you are reaching out like for the book your hope/book is just about out of reach and  maybe as you wake up you are starting to put the trouble to the side to face the day like nothing is happening and that is why the book just shrinks and falls away.  Then after around 6 years, you are more able to vocalize, are less reliant on others and have more control over your life.
Just a guess I have a vivid imagination.  Hope your dreams are more pleasant now.

[Murphyslaw1970]

Good Morning JamieEileen, thanks for your comment. Meditation is definately on my radar, I am learning various methods of relaxation, surrendering to it is clearly a self/enviornmental trust issue... Have you any particular knowledge about types of dreams. For a few years now I have read several books about dream and dream state including interpretation and I have found nothing that I can identify with that is on par with this particular memory. I also remembered last night as I feel asleep that I was ALWAYS able to tell prior to sleep when I would have my "telephone" experience, the wavy warped sensation always came over me prior to being asleep...I was never able to get away from it.
Thanks again for your feedback

[JamieEileen]

You need to ask questions when you are in your state of dream. I would learn how to meditate and maybe things will be more realized for you. Good luck and keep me posted.