Grief and Loss Community
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Avatar universal

Want someone to talk to about losing a baby

Hey, I could use someone to talk to.  I had a daughter on 2/27/13 she was amazing. She had growing problems her whole life and we are poor. She went to the doctors for every checkup always on top of that. When she was about 10 months old we found her in her crib not breathing, my husband did CPR and brought her back. We went to the hospital and were there three days before they just sent us home. Due to family problems we moved just before her first birthday, everything was going good, it was all starting to work out.  On march 5th about a week after her first birthday I got the news that my great grandmom had died. I went into my room to wake up my daughter and she wouldn't wake up the only thing she would do was cry this tired cry that will haunt me forever. We took her to the hospital, she got transferred twice before ending up at chop, they ran test after test, but for days later they pronounced her brain dead.  We still don't know what caused it.
5 Responses
Avatar universal
Oh hunny I am heart broken for you. I couldn't possibly imagine what you have been through. I don't know what I would do if I lost my daughter. She is the reason I wake up every day. I wish I had advice to help you. I wish I could hug you. Your baby is on a better place watching over you. A year ago I miscarried my baby. So I know the grief. But what you have been through.. knowing and holding and loving that baby.. I just could not even grasp. If yyou ever need someone to talk to.. vent or whatever I'm here. Please do not keep your feelings in. Again I am so sorry for your loss.
Avatar universal
I am so sorry for you and your husband and mostly your baby. I couldn't imagine. Exp finding her not breathing like that probably messed with the both of your heads. I couldn't imagine losing my baby and my baby isn't even born yet. Hold on to the year you got with her and know your grand mom is up in heaven taking care of her and they are both looking down on you and you have gained a beautiful angel, she's not gone, she's still in your heart. Stay strong and be as happy as you can be for her. She would want her mommy to be happy.
Avatar universal
I lost my son too last October. I was so heart broken. I couldn't deal. And sometimes I still can't. I'm so sorry for your loss sweetie. I can't say it'll get better cause it won't. At least it hasn't for me. Were mothers of angels.
Avatar universal
Its been 4 yrs since I lost my daughter.Its an unexplainable feelingthat nothingcan relieve!My family and I celebrate her in every way we can. I have a book that I write her letters in. We keep her grave decorated and decorate it together forholidays. For her birthday we write messageson balloons and let them go. We even bake cupcakes for her: ) I still cry allthe time but I know she'sin a better place withno worries or suffering
Avatar universal
thank you everyone for answering.  You no one of the things that really helps me along is that my little girl's heart is still beating, it might be in a baby boy somewhere but her heart is still beating today.  she saved four lives.  Im hoping to start trying to have another baby soon.  I just feel like everything i do now isnt for anything, im a mom and im not being a mom.
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