Fear of hiv infection after symptoms

[Knightrider1583]

Hello Doctor,

Firstly, I really want to thank you for your time and appreciate the work you are doing for the
people with this forum. This is in continuation to my earlier note which i accidently
posted in the std forum instead of this one. I had been to an exotic spa (sexual massage parlour)
7 days ago in toronto. I performed cunnilingus on the woman massuse for about 15 minutes and she did a hand job following that. There was no sexual intercourse or kissing of any kind. I also have to mention that i have a tooth that is slightly protruding inward and brushes with my tongue which gives me
feeling that there is a bruise but i often check in the mirror and i have never ever noticed
blood or a cut in that region. I have lost my sleep since the exposure incident and i am unable to work. Please help me. Two days after the exposure i met my doctor who said that there is a posibility of
infection and directed me to give a blood test for HIV and syphilis, which i did.
Since today morning i have noticed a lump in both my armpits. The lump in the right armpit is slightly larger in size. I do have joint pains and muscle pain, but i am not thinking about it too much
as i think it is due to stress and anxiety i am undergoing. Please guide me on what to do doctor.
I am about to get married in a few months. I can't proceed with all this happening. I know i made a huge mistake, but this was my first time (and the last one). I have never ever touched a woman before this.
Please help me doctor.

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

I told you this forum has nothing more to offer.  I have given all the adivce I'm going to.  Replying to your psychological cry for help will simply delay your seeking the kind of care you really need.  The suggestion from WorriedCanadian makes sense.

Any more comments and I will immediately delete the entire thread.

[WorriedCanadian]

Sorry to interrupt.
You can go to AIDS Committee of Toronto.
http://www.actoronto.org/

[Knightrider1583]

Doctor Handsfield,

I humbly request you to kindly let me keep this thread active for a few more days.
I did return to my doctor as per your advice. The result of the tests from the blood sample i had given on the second day after exposure has come and it was negative for both hiv and syphilis. But he said that there is nothing he can say about my recent exposure and i have to wait for three months. There are swellings under both my armpits for the last four days and it is not coming down. I have never had these before. I have joint pains and muscle ache too.I am unable to attribute all these my stress and anxiety. The back of my head and neck aches. Everytime i feel an itch in my throat, i panic, and immediately do a salt water gargle.I mentioned all this to my doctor and he told me that it is difficult to separate out any symptoms at this stage and only have to wait. I am not sure how long i can live this way. My head hurts. I have never had any serious health problem in my life so far (i am 26 years old) and not a cold or fever in the last 3-4 years. I eat well and exercise everyday. And now, when I type any of my symptoms on the search and one of the causes is hiv infection in every case and i am in the window period. Doc, believe me, i am from a very conservative and traditional family. I have never touched a girl before in my life and i was not going to until when i get married. I had a very bad day at office that day and i dont know what came over me and i made this terrible mistake. If something goes wrong my family cannot survive this impact and i cant live to see it.
I totally understand how difficult it must be for you to answer so many people and their questions and i am really sorry for making this too long. I live alone and away from home. I do have friends but i cant talk to them about this because they are from a similar background too. Can you also please suggest me some place in Toronto, where i can get some counselling to get through the window period. I couldnt get much help from my doctor on this. Couldnt find much in the net either. Anything i get would give me great relief. Need your help, Please.

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

As you were told in response to your question on the STD forum last week, cunnilingus is extremely low risk for HIV, maybe zero.  Therefore, it really is not a realistic possibility that any symptoms you have are due to HIV, no matter how typical for acute HIV infection they may seem to be.  Almost certainly your doctor was just being careful; I doubt he really suspects you were at high risk for either syphilis or HIV.

Anyway, your symptoms don't suggest either HIV or syphilis.  Neither causes lymph node swelling only in the armpits as the only symptom.  And I don't necessarily accept that you have lumps in your armpits at all; self-assessment of such things is extremely unreliable, as you seem to know yourself.  I agree that stress and anxiety over your sexual indiscretion is the main problem here.

Since you're concerned about it, return to your doctor and frankly discuss both your fears and your symptoms.  Then follow his advice.  In the meantime, mellow out and try to stop worring.  Whatever is going on, it isn't HIV.

There's no point in any further "yes but" or "what if" follow-up questions.  There is nothing more this forum can do.

Best wishes--  HHH, MD