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Mutual Masturbation Help!!!

Hi Doctor,

I'm freaking out!! I was with a paid lady exactly 9 weeks ago. Neither of us had a condom so intercourse was out of the question. But I still wanted to have some fun. So I asked her to give me a handjob which she did. However, she spit on her hand for lubrication purposes. Then as I was getting into it I started to finger her. I never entered the vaginal hole and pretty much only touched the clit. When I felt that she was getting a little dry I think I licked that same finger to lubricate it (I say think because I am not sure if it was the same finger I used to "finger" her). The scary thing is that I burned my tongue on some hot chocolate right before the incident so it was kind of sore. Then after a little while I told her to stop and I finished myself off (I'm not sure if I used the same hand used to finger her but what if I did?)

I'm very paranoid and can not wait until the three months are up so I can get tested. But I'm freaking out and do not know what to do. Since the incident I'm checking myself daily for rashes, which I did get one a few weeks ago on my arm but it went away throuhout the day. I hadn't had a fever but I did get a really bad cold about 4 weeks after the incident that lasted about two weeks. Also, my penis has burning acting a little weird. It has been dripping more often and it kind of gets a little itchy near the tip. It doesn't really hurt or burn when I pee but I can tell a difference. Or then again, maybe I'm just paranoid. ALSO, in the past week, my mouth has been really dry when I wake up in the morning which is out of the ordinary for me. Maybe I just need a humidifier.
Please Help!

Thank you,
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239123 tn?1267651214
Welcome to the forum and thanks for your question. But my reply will be brief.  Based entirely on the title you chose for your question, you are not at risk for HIV.  The virus is not transmitted by mutual masturbation.  Never once has there been a case of HIV/AIDS that appeared to have been acquired by hand-genital contact, kissing, etc.  Without insertive sex -- a bare penis (no condom) in another person's vagina, rectum or (rarely) mouth, there is no sexual transmission of HIV.

Now I have looked at the question itself.  My initial impression is correct; you describe a zero risk exposure.  There is no chance you caught HIV, and your burned tongue makes no difference.  And if you're in the US or other industrialized country, it is is unlikely your partner has HIV anyway.

You misunderstand the timing of HIV tests.  You need not wait until 3 months for a reliable result.  Depending on the specific tests or combinations of tests done, the result is definitive 4-6 weeks after exposure.  Below is the link to a thread that explains why official advice remains 3 months despite reliable results at earlier times.


Finaly, your penile symptoms do not sound alarming, and for sure they are not due to any infection from the exposure you are concerned about.  My guess is that your anxiety is making you notice otherwise trivial or entirely normal body sensations.  And dry mouth is one of the main physical symptoms of anxiety or stress.

So if this is your only potentially risky event, you really shouldn't be at all worried, do not need testing for HIV or any other STDs, and if you have a regular partner, you can safely continue sex with that person.

Best wishes-- HHH, MD
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