Thanks for reading the forum before asking your question. You obviously have learned some of the things to expect in this response. However, you missed some other very common themes, including the fact that symptoms NEVER reliably indicate new HIV infection. Whatever symptoms you have make no difference in my assessment of your risk. That is because even when someone has classical symptoms of new HIV infection (you do not), absolutely identical symptoms occur much more commonly from many other conditions that are much more common.
You say nothing about your partner. But assuming you are in the US or other industrialized country, if her age is similar to yours, and further assuming she is not an injection drug user or commercial sex worker, it is almost impossible that she had HIV. I agree 100% with the advice you received from your own doctor. I also disagree that "HIV does not care about statistics". Statistics -- the scientific application of available data about risks -- are the only rational basis to answer questions like yours.
The "small" condom makes little or no difference. As you will find as your sexual epxerience increases, all properly used condoms cover only about 2/3 to 3/4 of the penile shaft. It is most important to cover the head and the urethra (penile opening). Although some STDs (herpes, syphilis, HPV) can be transmitted to and from the penile shaft, HIV and the other important STDs (gonorrhea, chlamydia, etc) are completely protected regardless of the skin-skin contact that occurs above the condom.
To the specific questions:
1) The lesion makes no difference. Still 1 in 2,000. And since your partner almost certainly didn't have HIV, even the 1 in 2,000 estimate doesn't apply.
2) Something other than HIV explains your symptoms. The most likely possibility is anxiety magnifying normal body sensations and making you notice things that otherwise you woudn't have been aware of. But if you remain concerned about them, go back to your doctor and work with him or her to work it out.
3) Your fears have no basis in reality. You seem to have a typically inflated persective on HIV and its risks, not uncommon in young people who have been exposed to typical media attention and often to politically-influenced, unbalanced health education programs in school. Please educate yourself.
Bottom line: You have no worries here. You don't need HIV testing. Please educate yourself; if you do not, you're going to have a very anxiety-dominated, perhaps psychologically impaired sex life. Sex is too important to let it be so influenced by the kinds of fears you describe.
I hope this helps. Best wishes-- HHH, MD
Thanks. In my follow-up comments I forgot it was condom-protected sex. stillworried's risk of being hit by a meteorite is higher than the chance he caught HIV.
and i assume that Dr Handsfield stats are based on unprotected sex. Yours was protected. significantly reducing the risk, if not eliminating it completely
There is almost no chance a woman like you describe has HIV. Her number of past sex partners doesn't actually make much difference, and in any case, from perspectives of HIV risk, 5-10 lifetime partners doesn't amount to much.
I reiterate that your symptoms do not matter. I don't care what you have read about lymph node enlargements or anything else. Your symptoms don't come close to suggesting HIV and do not change my assessment that you do not have it.
"By a miracle" you will test negative? Get real. Say there was a 1 in 1,000 chance your partner had HIV. (That's too high an estimate, but we'll take a pessimistic stance.) If she did have HIV, the chance you caught it from a single episode of unprotected vaginal sex is 1 in 2,000. Simple math says, therefore, that your risk of having HIV is 0.001 x 0.0005 = 0.0000005. That's 1 chance in 2 million.
How high is that? Consider this: as a resident of the US, the National Safety Council calculates the chance you will die of an accident within the next 12 months is 1 in 1,756. That makes accidental death in the coming year more than 1,100 times more likely than the chance you have HIV.
You need to start using your brain and look at this objectively rather than through the emotional filter of anxiety over your first sexual experience. You don't even need HIV testing. But when you get tested anyway, you can be sure of a negative result. (If it were to be positive, you and your doctor would have to explore other possible sources of infection that you have somehow denied or didn't recognize.)
Also stop searching for HIV symptoms online. Literally almost every symptom that can be caused by all the hundreds of common infections that human beings get is listed in one or more HIV information websites.
Finally, don't forget your seatbelt!
Time to accept the reassurance and move on. That's all for this thread.
Yeah she is a US citizen.. lives in same general area as I, and is same age. Shes not a sex worker or anything like that BUT i know she has had sex with many guys (5-10 max?), and she said she was tested a year ago and had nothing but i know shes been with guys within that time. I appreciate your thoughts on my issues, u have no idea the troubles this has been causing me whether it be concentrating in college or just my mindset at work / or with friends. Question concerning lymph nodes is how long should they be enlarged and should they hurt? cus my chin ones dont hurt but the ear one is sort of painful if i touch it... im sure my weeks of research on the subject whether it be here or google or books or whatever arent helping me ease my axiety but i can't even help it anymore. This whole thing is rediculous to me that im even here on this site talking about this but the fact is that i am and i am very concerned. If when i do end up getting tested i somehow by a miracle test negative... i will be undergoing many life changes and not take things for granted but that seems so far away.