Anxiety Consuming Me

[bkevin]

Myself=Male Straght
I had oral sex unprotected with a female but no sex, vag/anal.
I have no clue since one night stand what her status was.
I have tested and tested with results negative.
    1 week blood test and std panel=negative
    2 week oral swab=negative
    15 day DNA PCR=neg
    3 week finger *****=neg
    4 week finger *****=neg
    5 week finger *****=neg

I keep thinking to myself what if it becomes positive, that my life will cease since I have a family which I have sustained sex with my wife since the episode.  
The docs on this forum say no risk and I shoudl move on but why cant I?
Somedays are good, some are bad but is this guilt I am feeling since I cheated on me wife?  

[JeanClaude]

Absolutely agreed! I was supporting your point that even the very low total HIV+ test result prevalence would be even lower in "Low Risk " centers. The majority of the posters here fit into that "Low Risk" demographic. Therefore their chances would be even lower than the overall number. Very good work with that data, thanks for posting.
Regards,
-JC-

[joggen]

Yes, of course it was a faulty test. That is the ONLY thing that you put yourself at risk for- a faulty test result- by severely overtesting over a no risk situation.

You've been given excellent advice in this thread and I think this forum has done its job. We don't need to hear your negative result next week since its a foregone conclusion, and there is no need to keep repeating ourselves, so I am closing this thread to further comments. Collect your final negative result, stay off of HIV forums, and please get back to your life.

--------------------------------------------THREAD CLOSED------------------------------------------------------

[bkevin]

So with the other negatives today, the other one was just a faulty test?


Your responses are grateful

[blokecalledkev]

Hi there,

I agree with you totally. The figures I offered up were simply a national snap shot and were not broken down demographically. I guess if you were to do region to region then the percentages would alter significantly. The point remains though, they being a large percentage of people who test for HIV actually test negative.

Regards Kevin.

[JeanClaude]

As you can clearly see, your repeated NEGATIVE testing history is clear indication of your NEGATIVE status. If you insist on testing through Labcorp., go ahead. Accept your impending NEGATIVE result and move on with your life. Don't come back saying "But the technician said I need to test out to 6 months". There is no more we can do for in this forum. If your fears persist, please seek help from a Mental Health Professional. -JC-

[bkevin]

I did administer two tests after that one, and one just now.  My fingers look like diabetic right now and that one came back negative.  I feel relieved.  

I really love the support.  I am getting a blood lab work done by LabCorb on Monday PM which will be 1 day shy of 6 weeks.  That should be my final test.

[JeanClaude]

Regarding your HIV testing numbers in the UK, I would say that if those statistics were broken down by Testing Center Location, Testing Centers in "Low Risk" communities would have significantly lower HIV + test results  whereas the testing centers in  homosexual/high-risk communities would yield the higher percentage of POSITIVES. Keep in mind as well that centers in LOW-RISK communities often experience a HIGHER rate of FALSE POSITIVES than in those HIGH-RISK communities.

-JC-

[JeanClaude]

Your first test with 2 lines appears to be invalid.We occasionally see an invalid test if the device itself was damaged or the test was administered incorrectly .If you had 2 subsequent NEGATIVES, you are indeed HIV NEGATIVE.In your case, as you've been repeatedly told, an HIV test under your circumstances was UNWARRANTED. Keep in mind,the more often you test(especially needlessly) the more likely you are to receive a "False Positive" or other anomalous result.
-JC-

[blokecalledkev]

Hi there,

I am sorry but I am really unsure what you expect anybody on this forum to say to you. You have been assured, repeatedly , that your risk was zero, you have been shown, repeatedly how low your risk was and you have had negative tests. Please, help with what ?

You are HIV negative. Does that help or are you going to carry on needlessly freaking out ?

Regards Kevin.

[bkevin]

I took a Unigold and the lady had trouble with it.  There were though TWO lines.  THe first was off the grid,and second definjitive.  I am really scared.  I took two more which were negative.  PLEASE HELP.

[blokecalledkev]

Hi there,

Please allow me to throw some figures to to put your anxiety in context. These are figures from 2008 and are of course are open to your own interpretation

In the UK in 2008 there was approximately 950,000 HIV tests carried in sexual health clinics. Of those 950,000 tests 7298 tested positive. In percentage terms that is 0.768 %.

In other words of all the people that were tested in the UK, in 2008 for HIV approx 0.7% actually came back positive. The other 99.3% were negative.

For all the worry, all the symptoms, all the risk that actually prompted people to be tested in the first place, 99.3% of the people tested were actually negative. That in real terms is approx 942700 people, who for what ever reason believed they needed tested, i.e. risk factors, symptoms or simply peace of mind did not have HIV.

Naturally this is only a snap shot of one country during one period. That being a developed country (the UK) in 2008. Given the same principles and crunching the numbers for other countries may give different results.

So, why so much anxiety ? Fear, fear of something that is not there.

Regards Kevin.

[JeanClaude]

The Fear of becoming infected with HIV can be an overwhelming and life altering prospect. The truth is that yes, HIV is a manageable disease, however, it does carry many physical and mental health implications. These facts combined with the guilt over the possibility of infecting someone else especially a loved one is a terrifying prospect. What you must be able to be however is to differentiate the fears of HIV infection from the scientific and biological realities of the HIV virus. Because you afraid of being infected with HIV does NOT change the modes by which HIV is able to infect. Additionally, HIV testing is EXTREMELY accurate these days. You will NOT be "THE" exception to the WINDOW PERIOD of modern testing ability not will you be infected with some MYSTERY STRAIN of HIV which is NONDECTABLE with testing. Use condoms properly and EVERYTIME during vaginal or anal sex with a person of unknown status. Do NOT engage in IV drug use. If you follow these suggestions, HIV is NOT a realistic concern for you. Always believe your TEST RESULT. -JC-

[bkevin]

SO why do so many people have the same anxiety as I do?  

[JeanClaude]

As joggen has told you, there was no need to test over this incident. Yes, in your case 6 weeks are indeed CONCLUSIVE based on lack of risk.

[bkevin]

But Joggen I have, I guess it is a anxiety relief but this is serious and I am scared.

For any event, is 6 weeks long enough to be conclusive?  Finger pri&&*& test.

[joggen]

Yes, and I would never have tested for HIV in the first place.

[bkevin]

If I can ask another question.  If you were in my boat would you have sex with your wife?

[bkevin]

So I just talked to Mass HIV hotline.  THey said Oral sex is rare/no risk.  And 6 week test is conclusive for most events.

I keep testing, get scared waiting for my result.  Then feel relieved when I get the results for a few days.  Then repeat process.  

Are other people in my same boat?

[joggen]

You can test everyday for the rest of your life- the result isn't going to change because you did nothing to jeopardize your negative serostatus.

[bkevin]

WHy dont I trust the results?

I went in again last night for a ORAL swab since I didnt trust the finger pri** ones.  That one came back NEG as well at 36 days.  

[blokecalledkev]

Hi there,

Why do you worry ? I guess it is just in our nature to think the worst and hope for the best. Realistically though, you worry is unfounded, oral sex really does carry no risk.

Having been through what you are going through, I can only offer you advice based on my own personnel experiences. Please stop examining yourself, stop googling "HIV symptoms" and please stop trying to diagnose  yourself. When you are worried and concerned small thing that generally go unnoticed can and do become massive issues. Please stop looking for ways to confirm your worst fears, trust your results, your risk was zero.

Regards Kevin.

[bkevin]

So why do I worry?  Why do I take tests every week?  I assume a 6 week finger p*rick is 100% right?  I even took a DNA PCR test which was negative at 15 days.  I am constintlt unfocused and a wreck.  Every little ache, I think I have swollen neck lymph...but I am pretty sure it just my anxiety and those are my neck muscles.  HELP

[england66]

You are worrying for no reason, oral sex is not one of the ways the virus is transmitted unless the person was end stage AIDS infected and was bleeding heavily in the mouth . There has never been a documented case of this happening, take care and quit worrying