Hi there very worried. I am an educated person but I can't shake the feeling I have caught HIV. The situation is I am with a long term partner whom I don't have sex with. He has issues with depression and this has lead to not having a sex life and as a result I have been unfaithful and am now filled with deep regret. During 2 separate encounters I performed unprotected oral sex on an ex boyfriend, he performed oral sex on me. On one ocassion he ejaculated in my mouth and in the other we finished with protected vaginal sex.
Within a few days of my second encounter, the one in which he ejaculated in my mouth I felt my lymph nodes swell and came down with a sore throat and what I felt was a mild fever and this lasted around 3weeks. I went to the docs and explained the situation. He examined my mouth and said he sees hundreds of cases like this and not to be ashamed but he didn't think my lymph nodes seemed swollen nor was my temp high although I felt 100% that I was ill. I must admit I did fall victim of Google symptom checker so I started worrying about HIV.
Sore throat lasted another few days followed by the onset of a runny nose and bit of lathargy more a cold type rather than the flu. Some night sweats although mild. It more feels like pollen allergies but I can't shake the worry its HIV. My ex says he is clean but I am not sure he has checked this out.
I am waking up after nightmares about HIV and feel like I won't even go near my boyfriend to even kiss him. I feel like my relationship could be over etc. Am I at risk or is it just an irrational fear?
Prior to this scare I have always winced at the word HIV and cancer so is it just paranoia or should I get tested?
Apologies for the rant just feel like I have nobody to talk to..