Scared sick

[scaredinseattle622]

I'm happily married but once in a while get weak and transgress with an internet (Eros.com) escort.  But always use a condom with vaginal sex.  Will get unprotected oral.  Never give.  Sometimes finger.  Last night a beautiful lady around 20 y/o shows up and quickly gets very horny. Deep kissing, heavy oral on me, etc.  When time for intercourse, said she didn't have a condom.  So I asked if we could run to gas station.  We did, came back and had sex vaginal and anal with condom.  Before anal, had my index finger deep inside anal to prepare. After vaginal, felt guilty, lost erection and wanted to quit. She insisted she wanted it anal. Having smoked weed and very high I put another condom on and did a min or two of anal, then noticed was bloody just outside anus, and then on condom. Immediately stopped.  I got upset and she wanted me to continue.  Said she just wanted me to have a good time.  Also, afterward noticed that my forefinger, which had been fairly deep inside by itself (which later had blood) had a small cuticle cut. No blood coming out that I could see, but red and definitely cut. I can't bare the thought of bringing something into my house or to my wife. I'm done doing this I assure you!  I'm scared out of my mind.  More so because between this girl showing up without a condom, pushing me to have anal sex, and not caring that she was bleeding, it would appear that something else was going on. Thank you so much for any help you can lend.

[scaredinseattle622]

Thank you very much for your response.  My only question is, if you don't feel that there's a risk of HIV transmission, why are you so definitive that I should get tested?  I've seen many other experts' responses here that have heard similar-type descriptions of sexual activity that said basically, don't worry, and no need to get tested.  I just need to understand why your advice to me is more cautionary.  By the way I'm happy to pay more if need be in order to get another response.  
Thanks.  

[Dr Sean Cummings]

Hmmmm!

Bit of a pickle for you and I can't give you definite answers, but hopefully can assist.

Fingering anuses often ends up with blood/bleeding, especially if the fingerer is high and maybe just a little careless.

That said, I really don't think that the bleeding represents an HIV threat to you. I can see and understand that it may scare you, but not infect you.

However, and here's the thing....you need now to wait before you have sex with your wife until you have had a reliable HIV test.

There are labs in the US which will perform HIV DUO/Combo tests at 28 days after exposure and there are labs which will do HIV RNA PCR tests after 7 days - these particular tests take up to 1 to 2 weeks to come back in the US. In the UK, barring bad weather, Icelandic volcanic dust, riots etc we can usually have these back in 5 working days.

Best wishes, Sean