HIV infected Partner

[ipsum71]

I met this really great guy about a month ago and we have had sex but he has never anally had sex with me but I have with him.  I remember when I first got with him I seemed to get a sinus infection and got on some antibiotic and it went away...I had a sore throat and Green stuff was coming from my nose...I don't think that was an indication of HIV exposure but I may be wrong.  Anyway the guy got tested because I wanted to more with him and it turns out he is positive.  I was negative last time I checked which I haven't had a partner.  Anyway, I really like this guy...He is all that I have ever imagined...I am 35 and not an idiot or hard up but can I persue a relationship with him and keep my status negative?  I guess I would start wearing a condom when I had anal intercourse with him...but I want to have oral sex with him and I don't want him to wear a condom for that etc...Should I just break it off or is there a chance I could have a great sex life with this guy because he fits me emotionally and mentally!

[troggs]

So you have already had unprotected anal sex with this person, yet you seem more concerned about getting unprotected oral?

[JohnnyXY]

I suppose this may begin a debate, but its what I've read and what an HIV councilor told me and my BF:

I'm a bottom.  He's a top.  I've read and discussed with said councilor and am under the impression that I, as an HIV positive person, can perform oral sex on your penis without a cause for alarm so long as
a) I haven't brushed my teeth in the past hour or so
b) don't have any other rips or cuts in my mouth that would expose your penis to blood
c) am not infected by a gum disease that would also cause bleeding

You should not, however, perform oral sex on him without a condom.  Basically...avoid the obvious...his blood and his semen...it shouldn't be too difficult...one tastes like copper, the other like asparagus..LOL

Sillyness aside...I've managed to keep all my bf's neg, and have followed these simplified rules...But if you still have concerns...and DO like this guy...then find an outreach program with a councilor, make and appointment, and chat it out.  

[farfromperfect]

Hey man why you talkin about me like that.  LOL.  

Sorry, shouldn't be joking.  This is a very serious post.  Ipsum, you need to start using condoms faithfully and correctly NOW!  You also need to be tested 3 months after the last unprotected exposure with your boyfriend.  Im not trying to make you nervous, but you need to know your status as of the present.  Condoms are a must in this situation.

Catsco,  Are you really postive for HIV?  It seems is if there is speculation surrounding this issue.  

[thinstar]

I would imagine it depends on how much the two of you genuinely value each other's well being.  Yes, a wonderful relationship can blossom despite someone's HIV status but precautions should, I believe, still be taken.