Am I infected or freaking out

[Scareddad1]

Im  35 living in Midwest America, 7 weeks ago I had an unprotected vaginal encounter with a girl I don't know very well,  for about 3 minutes. after wich I found out she used to work in a "massage parlor" .  Since I found that out I have worried myself to death, to the point of panic attacks. I don't know if my symptoms are anxiety or ars. I have felt hot flashes, with no fever. I have had regular headaches almost daily ,I have gotten headaches somewhat regularly before, but since have been more frequent, feel dizzy occasionally , my stomach has been in knots and I sometimes feel nautious. I feel tired constantly, and don't sleep well. I have no rashes but itch from time to time, no rashes and no fever. I know I'm probably just freaking myself out, as my wife has no symptoms but I'm a new dad, and am freaking out thinking I gave my wife with whom I was separated for a short period and have now reconciled with something, and that I jeapordized our ability to raise our daughter.  The girl I hooked up with said she has never had anything other than a simple bacteria infection. Please ease my mind doc. Thank you in advance, as this is starting to consume me.

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

Welcome to the forum. Thanks for your question.  Bottom line:  there is virtually no chance you have HIV.

Like many people today, you have some basic misunderstandings about HIV frequency and the risks of sexual transmission.  First, it is statistically unlikely a woman like your partner has HIV -- under one chance in 1,000 and more likely 1 in 10,000 or lower.  Second, if a woman has HIV, the average HIV transmission risk is once for every 2,000 episodes of unprotected vaginal sex.  That's why many spouses of HIV infected persons remain free of infection even after months or years of unprotected sex.  (I'll be you didn't know that.)  Taken together, the combined odds calculate as 1 chance in 2 million to 20 million that you caught HIV.

As for your symptoms, they are not typical of HIV, despite what you think you have learned by looking on line or elsewhere.  See this thread from earlier today, my blog-like follow-up comment:     http://www.medhelp.org/posts/show/1752305    ; You have actually put your finger on the probable cause; and whenever a person suggests his or her own symptoms have a psychological origin, usually s/he is correct.

But the important question is mine for you:  why haven't you had an HIV test?  Presumably you haven't been tested or you would have said so.  Do it now.  Enough time has passed for reliable results (see http://www.medhelp.org/posts/show/1704700), and the negative result will probably reassure you a lot more than reassurance based on probability and statistics.  This doesn't mean I believe you really were at risk; I do not.  The reason for testing is strictly for reassurance.

Feel free to return with a follow-up comment to let me know the result after you have been tested for HIV.  Until then, let's not have any "yes but" or "are you sure" questions.  There is nothing you can add that would change my opinion or advice.  You can be very, very confident you don't have HIV.

I hope this has been reassuring.  Best regards--  HHH, MD

[H. Hunter Handsfield, M.D.]

Glad to have helped. Take care.  And listen to that wise wife!

[Scareddad1]

Thanks for the reply doc, reading your words it felt like a ton of bricks were lifted off of my shoulders, what you guys do for people here is amazing. I didn't test 1 out of fear. 2 because I told my wife of my transgression and even she said that I'm crazy. Lol. 3 because my regular doc office told me that I should wait til between 6and 8 weeks, and in reply to what you posted earlier, no, I didn't know that. But thank you. Thank you a million times over, I have learned a valuable valuable lesson here. And yes I really knew I was overreacting in my head because at first after this incident I was convinced I had chlamydia, even took a week long course of levaquin, before I knew I didn't have it. Then started focusing on these symptoms. And tiding them to HIV through an online std symptom checker. Then found the same ones on an anxiety checker. The Internet can be a scary scary place , and I have learned that you can tie all symptoms to anything if you look hard enough. But I really needed to hear it from a medical professional. Thank you again.