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Avatar universal

HIV...COULd i have been EXPOSED *revised*

Im a 22  year old houstonian female, for the past 7 years I have been in fear or having contracted HIV from an ex boyfriend I was with at the age of 14..he at the time was 23. He is the LAST male that I have been with sexually & im scared to have sex with anyother man out of fear for passing on this disease that I might have...lookin back at his lifestyle now, i would definitly consider him to be an "at risk" indivisual.
He and I had maybe 4 sexual encounters in our relationship. But it was on our LAST sexual encounter that i experienced the biggest accident of my life.
We were having sex,
i was on top..
as i got up..
we noticed that the condom was no longer on his penis...
who knows how long it had been off.....
its been so long, i dont recall if i had any initial flu symtoms after the incident...
ive had the flu once in my life but i CANT REMEMBER if it was BEFORE or after him...

The MOST unfortunate part of it is that ive been in the US since I was 3 years old buT UNDOCUMENTED.
and now im trying to get my residency/citizenship im going to have to take an immigration physical. Which includes an HIV test, and if i am in fact postive i will be DEPORTED to a country i know NOTHING about, even though i contracted the disease in the US.

It Feels like im between a rock & a hard place, fear of the results is keeping me from gettin tested because i dont want to face the fact that i may be deported not to mention have to live with this disease for the rest of my life... I feel as though ive exhibited all of the symptoms at one time or another throughout the years..
swollen/tender lymph nodes...about 3 incidences night sweats a couple of years ago...*RECENT*--->((night neck & chest sweats)) happened 3 nights ago!!
Ive never had persistant diarrhea, but i do get head aches and sometimes ive awoken to my hands being numb. No strange weight loss, or muscle pains..buT  I feel as though ive had the most SIGNIFICANT symptoms at one time or another which are the lymph nodes and occasional night sweats...

Time is growing shorter...and i really dont know what to do with my situation...its like im trapped the prison which is my mind and its slowly killing me because i just dont know where to turn. Especially because of my immigrant status..does anyone have any advise, or any information about immigration and HIV....its like im so certain i have it..but im afraid to know for sure because that means the truth is PERMINATE...living a life of "maybe.." is easier to me than living a live of DEFINATE...

i just dont want to get deported...but i dont want to live like this..i ALWAYS preeched to my friends about using condoms and HIV & std's...never thought I would be in this perdicament..Im sure i have it..i just know that i do...
9 Responses
Avatar universal
you can take a hiv rapid test which would be anonymous you dont have to give  your name or any personal information at all they give you a number at the std clinic and you are called by that number only you dont have to show any proof or immigration status so if your concerned go to a std clinic and get tested its free
571685 tn?1217998548
Correct me if I am wrong, but I gauge that you had a single unprotected exposure with your ex-boyfriend, alongside another 3, 4 instances that were protected. The majority of sexual interaction you had with this man constitutes protected sex which is a ZERO risk activity, thus you need not worry about those incidents.

That being said though, the single incident of unprotected sex did put you at risk; albeit very low. It's been 7 years post-exposure, a single HIV antibody test will suffice at this point, and settle you off all your worries. Your anxieties in this situation are unwarranted for a number of reasons that only serve to re-assure you that you actually have little to worry about:

(1) If you were to scan some of the answers provided by Dr.Handsfield or Dr.Hook at the HIV expert forum, they've stated that the estimated risk of HIV transmission during a single unprotected exposure like yours is 1 in 1000. However this figure is ONLY applicable when you know for a fact that your partner is HIV positive, you however do NOT know your ex-boyfriend's status, hence your risk proves to be even lower than this statistic -- very low.

(2) Your risk is even lower considering the condom would've protected you till the point it slipped off your ex-boyfriend's penis completely.

(3) Symptoms are NOT reliable indicators in the process of diagnosing HIV, only Testing will accurately ascertain your status. That being said, the symptoms you describe are NOT due to ARS as nobody experiences them several years later. They also do NOT present themselves off & on at points in time like they did for you. True ARS symptoms typically present themselves 2-4 weeks after an exposure, and last for anywhere between 1-2 weeks where all symptoms manifest together and then progressively disappear concurrently as well.

I'm sorry but in regards to US immigration formalities I cannot be of any help as I myself have no knowledge on that matter. I'm sure some of the regulars on here who're American may perhaps be able to provide you further insight on this. In the meanwhile, a single HIV AB test will put your mind to rest permanently, and you'll be able to put this all behind you :) Like I said, anxiety has gotten the best of you, relax.      
Avatar universal
thank you SO MUCH for your insight.
you like an angel and youve just made me feel so much better, ive never talked to anyone about this and im so lucky that u happened to see this post and comment without judgement.
thank you so much...
Avatar universal
You're welcome. Keep us updated :)
Avatar universal
I am sorry, last message is for you actually not Houston, I actually think your post is very educational, I learn, but I want to know Houston's result...also....so keep us updated ok :)
571685 tn?1217998548
Kindly refrain from posting for the sake of posting. Consider yourself warned.
Avatar universal
I think you'd like latest news on the topic: recently US congress passed new law where ban on visiting and immigrating of positive people to the USA is lifted.
Avatar universal
are u serious about that ban? omg where can i get that information from??
Avatar universal
What s o they mean when they say 1/1000 exposure. As an it can take up to 1000 encounters for somebody to get this?  On an average?
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