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Avatar universal

I think I might have HIV

I think I may have HIV. I know a lot of people say this on here but in this case, I don't know what else to call what is happening. I know the only real way to know is to get a test which I am scared to death of doing but with my body starting to look the way it does, I may not have a choice. I had sex a year and a half ago with a girl who I found out just 3 months ago was HIV positive. The way I found out is on her facebook she's now a spokes model for AIDS Free World in San Francisco. Only found out 2-3 months ago and have been stressed out since finding this out and afraid to go to the doctor. This last week I ended up getting sick last weekend and now I have dark spots forming all over my body and fast. Since a couple of days ago I have rashes that are developing on the opposite side of my elbows. My skin is dry. I know this is most likely Karposi Sarcoma. I have started feeling a lot of anxiety, nauseous and can't sleep without feeling like crap the next morning. After seeing the rashes, I'm realizing I have to go in but I'm scared to death, mad at myself and wishing this wasn't happening. Can the rashes and black spots be anything else? after looking at the internet I know anxiety can cause a lot of this and seeing one post by a nurse on here that said similar, but I think I'm being optimistic. I need to get tested I know, but I want to know how much hope I have that this may not be HIV. The honest truth even if it's scary to admit. My whole body is looking paler, I'm so depressed and feel like I can only blame myself for not following God's warnings on how to live my life right and avoid this. the rashes don't even itch but I'm getting red and black all over. Can this be something else? any advice. I need to hear something cause right now I'm totally scared and alone
11 Responses
Avatar universal
I think this will calm you down a bit, first of all you do not know when the girl got it, may be she got it after your encounter, so when you had sex with her she was negative, secondly the odds that you got it are 1 in 1000 assuming you had unprotected sex from what you have written and she was positive then..
So for now think that she was negative at that time and you fall in the 999 category, but yes you need to get your test done, so do not waste any more time and get yourself tested.
Avatar universal
Yes It was unprotected. and she starred in an ad for the AIDS thing in times square it only 3 months after she left my apartment. we lived together and had sex a bit. I regret it now more than ever cause she was a horrible humanbeing, mean and even hit me 3 times, which the last time in the face was when I kicked her out my place. but now she might have given me a death sentence. I'm hurt and angry. and you can't even sue a person for doing something like that to you. What's the point. I hope that I don't have it and the rash isn't all over persay but I'm getting a small rash on inner arms and where my belt rubs up against on my side.... I'm having dark marks pop up on my legs and arms. I got a lot of these when I had fleas in my place and scratched em to death, plus my family has a history of having spots on our body. My little brother is the same way but when I got sick they started popping up out of no where. I bunch. my face and neck are still fine but I notice little red blotches popping up too on my arms. My body is becoming a wreck and I still want to know, is there anything else this rash can be from? anything at all? You're right, I need to go in and get tested. I need to extend my life if I got it but I'm hoping and praying I got something else. or its just anxiety although my more I see my body and see how just irritating certain parts I can easily rash up, It's making me less confident its something else.
Avatar universal
The only way to get over this is to go and get tested, and whether you can sue her or not is a question which a legal professional can answer. All I would say for now is that go and get tested there is no point waiting and making it more worse, if you do not test this anxiety will make it worse. And as such if I am not wrong people in the US are more tolerant towards HIV and do not stigmatize people with it unlike many developing countries.
So just go and get tested.........
Avatar universal
Also to be in the best shape and health of my life this last year and a half doing hours of exercise, and pushing myself constantly to now getting unexplained marks and rashes, having severe anxiety, night sweats this past week, being tired. I can say all of that has happened to me before not not with a combination of rashing up like this. What the heck else could it be and how could I be the epitomy of great health all this time and now just all this start happening.
Avatar universal
I do understand the kind of anxiety and stress you are going through but the only way to get out of this is to go and get tested whatever the result is, if its negative thank God and if its positive still thank God for the ARVs' which suppress the virus to undetectable levels and help you lead a normal life...
Avatar universal
You are right. I have to go. I guess I just want some hope that this rash and these symptoms could be something else besides HIV so when I go in I have some other hopeful possibilities to give me some kind of chance other than HIV positive or AIDS... Can anyone tell me any other possibility for these dark spots and rashes. I don't have a high temperature or fever. Never once in the last year and a half. Don't have dark stool. I don't have severe soar throat, I've never had any problems until now except for some dark spots. Is there no other possibilities if I test Negative for what this could be. Could this be severe anxiety or something else causing thhttp://www.medhelp.org/posts/HIV--Living-With/I-think-I-might-have-HIV/show/1729657#e rash or the spots since feeling sick. I've made my self this sick before just from stress from finals and work but the rash and spots made me realize I can't explain that one. any other possibilities?
Avatar universal
I am not a medical professional so I am not in a position to analyze the symptoms but what I know is that there are a whole bunch of other infectious bacteria and viruses which could cause it to happen. The only way out for you is to go and get tested and I don't think anyone in this world can assure that its not HIV except a test, and yes think that you are in the 999 category, and there are so many instances where people have had repeated unprotected sex with positive people and are still negative further the chances of female to male transmission are much lower than the other way round because as such the virus just has one place where it can enter your body and try to get to your blood stream that is your urethra.
Avatar universal
that does make me feel a little better about going in. it's like my body is aching but I know that I've made myself so scared about being sick that I've felt like this years ago before.. I wish there were more alternatives than HIV cause I'm not finding rash for many other alterbatives
480448 tn?1426948538
There is actually a much better chance that you are not infected.  I can understand the concern about her being an model for an AIDS organization, but I will say that that does not actually MEAN she is infected, she may truly just be a model.  

Nothing you have described is consistent with symptoms that would be present in someone newly infected.  We don't get into discussions over symptoms anyway, because they will never tell you your status, only a test will, plus, they are just too inconsistent.  Some newly infected people will not have one symptom, when someone with "textbook" ARS symptoms end up testing negative.

There was a study done in US emergency rooms of people who were seeking medical attention for what they presumed were HIV related symptoms.  99% of those people tested negative, and their symptoms were related to other things (common, every day illnesses).

Your only option is to test when it is appropriate.  A DUO test at 8 week post exposure would be an EXCELLENT indication of your status, with a follow up antibody test at 3 months for your conclusive result.  Being that your exposure was so long ago, any test you took would be conclusive at this point.  Just go get an antibody test done and get it over with.

As for putting the blame on this girl, being angry at her, saying she gave you a death sentence, etc etc, wanting to sue her...is simply ridiculous.  The ONLY person who is responsible for YOUR health and well being is YOU.  YOU made the decision to have unprotected sex with her, that's on you.  Unfortunately, people lie about their status, and there are people who are in the process of seroconverting, therefore, the only way to ensure you are safe is to use a condom for each and every episode of vaginal or anal sex.  I certainly do not condone someone who is positive not revealing that information to a new partner, but again, we can ONLY be responsible for ourselves.  So, I would advise you to let go of the anger now, it is aimed at the wrong person.  I'm sure that isn't what you want to hear, but it is true.  You need to take full responsibility for this situation.

Also, you are already convincing yourself you have KS due to your skin symptoms.  KS is an opportunistic infection that occurs in advanced HIV, when a person has transitioned over to an AIDS diagnosis.  Even if you DID get HIV from your encounter, I can virtually guarantee you don't have KS.  You would be in a hospital bed severely ill.  Not sitting at home typing on your computer.

This is why google is a nightmare.  People start searching and reading, yet they don't educate themselves enough to know what they are talking about, and start assuming the worst.

You had a risk, and need to be tested, it's as simple as that.  Like I said, it's probably more likely that you are NOT infected, HIV is a very hard virus to transmit.  Good luck.
480448 tn?1426948538
I forgot....STOP searching the internet.  It is literally the very WORST thing you could be doing.  It is only going to fuel your anxiety, and you still won't have any answers.
Avatar universal
Thank you. This is comforting too. I will schedule a test. I don't want to but I am going to do it. If I had KS I'd be in a hospital bed, I didn't know that. there's so many spots all over my body I don't know what the heck is wrong with me still, and this rashing up, I'm 32 and my body is looking like a mess. I haven't had sex in a year and a half since her so I was really scared cause I tested right before her and was negative but seeing her on this commercial for having AIDS I have been freaking out since. Even if I shouldn't be mad, I'm human. of course I'm mad. She was the biggest liar, meanest woman, tried to get me fired from my job, punched me in the face, acted crazy and to think she might have given me a disease, any human being would be upset. but that's why I should have protected myself, so you are right cause you can't control others only yourself. I have sickle cell trait so I was wondering maybe I bruise easier cause of that. I have no clue how to explain what's going on with me. I will set up an appointment and find out what's going on. Thank you for helping me to look at this more rationally instead of freaking out cause of a silly commercial for her new job.
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