Aa
I'm in big trouble
I am a European expat living in West Africa. About a year ago, I had a HIV scare but stupidly, I didn’t learn my lesson and find myself right back to square one.
6 days ago, I had protected vaginal sex with a prostitute. The condom didn’t break; I know this because I kept on checking and when I was finished, I filled it with water to see if there were any holes – there wasn’t. Besides the sex, I engaged in deep kissing and I rubbed the ladies clitoris whilst she gave me a hand job. There may have been a case of her touching her genitals and then mine or me touching her genitals and then mine. No oral of any sort.
The sad thing is, even though I had a second chance with life, I know that I’ve blown it now. I was intoxicated but I took the ladies number as I knew that I would end up stressing and thinking about her testing. I’ve been distressed all week and the lady tested today with a rapid test and Elisa; positive on both with HIV -1.
To hear it was almost like a death sentence. The lady is not on any treatment of any sort and no doubt has a high viral load. I am fearing the worst but there is nothing I can do at this stage. I will have a HIV -1 PCR on Tuesday and this will be 9 days after the event. This is Africa where HIV spreads like wildfire. The rates are so high and I just know that I will become another statistic. I have destroyed my life any can see no way out. Please help.
6 days ago, I had protected vaginal sex with a prostitute. The condom didn’t break; I know this because I kept on checking and when I was finished, I filled it with water to see if there were any holes – there wasn’t. Besides the sex, I engaged in deep kissing and I rubbed the ladies clitoris whilst she gave me a hand job. There may have been a case of her touching her genitals and then mine or me touching her genitals and then mine. No oral of any sort.
The sad thing is, even though I had a second chance with life, I know that I’ve blown it now. I was intoxicated but I took the ladies number as I knew that I would end up stressing and thinking about her testing. I’ve been distressed all week and the lady tested today with a rapid test and Elisa; positive on both with HIV -1.
To hear it was almost like a death sentence. The lady is not on any treatment of any sort and no doubt has a high viral load. I am fearing the worst but there is nothing I can do at this stage. I will have a HIV -1 PCR on Tuesday and this will be 9 days after the event. This is Africa where HIV spreads like wildfire. The rates are so high and I just know that I will become another statistic. I have destroyed my life any can see no way out. Please help.
When there are reported transmissions from protected sex, it is because the subjects inaccurately reported consistent and correct condom use when in fact there was a lapse in protection. Your logic is clearly flawed- there is no such thing as a "protected exposure". HIV transmission occurs through the head of the penis- if a condom is on, how is somebody supposed to be infected? HIV transmission is difficult during UNPROTECTED sex- the average frequency of transmission is 1 in 1000 exposures. HIV requires perfect conditions to infect which are not going to be present when a condom is covering the head of the penis. You simply could not have put yourself at risk for HIV infection from PROTECTED sex.
I had a negative DUO at 13 days but I suppose this is still too early to mean anything. I should have the result of the PCR tomorrow and this should mean a lot more.
I know that symptoms are not definitive but in saying that, I’d rather be symptom free in these early stages. Both sides of my neck are sore and I’m wondering if this is my lymph nodes fighting an infection? These have been tender for 2 days now. Obviously I’m worried and thinking that this is the start of seroconversion as I just know that I have been infected.
It’s easy for you guys to say that 'you never had an exposure' or something along the lines of ... there are no reported transmissions from protected sex. There ARE. It just depends on which reports you read. I've come across so many reports/studies where it has been deduced that people were infected via protected intercourse. It clearly IS as risk and warrants testing. Any sexual exposure with a positive person is and should be.
A blanket response saying that you do not need testing despite an exposure (albeit protected) with a positive person is not correct.
I respect the opinions here but I really do fear the worst.
I know that symptoms are not definitive but in saying that, I’d rather be symptom free in these early stages. Both sides of my neck are sore and I’m wondering if this is my lymph nodes fighting an infection? These have been tender for 2 days now. Obviously I’m worried and thinking that this is the start of seroconversion as I just know that I have been infected.
It’s easy for you guys to say that 'you never had an exposure' or something along the lines of ... there are no reported transmissions from protected sex. There ARE. It just depends on which reports you read. I've come across so many reports/studies where it has been deduced that people were infected via protected intercourse. It clearly IS as risk and warrants testing. Any sexual exposure with a positive person is and should be.
A blanket response saying that you do not need testing despite an exposure (albeit protected) with a positive person is not correct.
I respect the opinions here but I really do fear the worst.
When your test come back NEG. and this is all said and done. You will be singing a whole differnt song. You watch and see.
By the way protected sex is safe sex.
By the way protected sex is safe sex.
I’m awaiting the results of the PCR as noted above but I fear it will be positive. I’m just waiting for major symptoms to start anytime soon as I’m now entering that time frame. I had a negative DUO at 10 days (yesterday) whilst I gave blood for the PCR but this really means nothing.
Despite what you all say, protected sex is not safe sex, it is safer sex. The only safe sex is sex in a monogamous relationship where both individuals are negative. That and of course, abstinence. Yes, condoms are effective in preventing transmission but there are studies and reports showing they are not 100%. Transmission has occurred despite consistent and correct use for whatever reason.
It is irresponsible to state that condoms offer 100% protection and that there is no chance of infection even if used consistently and correctly. Only abstinence can guarantee 100%. If someone has had sex with a confirmed positive person, then it is a risk and I’m sure you can understand that it can be and is quite distressing. A test is absolutely necessary in these circumstances and TBH, I fear the worst.
I sincerely hope that you are all correct and whilst you certainly provide a fantastic service, anyone who has had sex with a confirmed positive person should be advised to test. An estimated 40,000 people in the US and over 1 million worldwide will contract the virus this year. It is obviously not THAT difficult to transmit despite the fact that I’ve read that nobody on this website has tested positive in 8 years of existence.
Despite what you all say, protected sex is not safe sex, it is safer sex. The only safe sex is sex in a monogamous relationship where both individuals are negative. That and of course, abstinence. Yes, condoms are effective in preventing transmission but there are studies and reports showing they are not 100%. Transmission has occurred despite consistent and correct use for whatever reason.
It is irresponsible to state that condoms offer 100% protection and that there is no chance of infection even if used consistently and correctly. Only abstinence can guarantee 100%. If someone has had sex with a confirmed positive person, then it is a risk and I’m sure you can understand that it can be and is quite distressing. A test is absolutely necessary in these circumstances and TBH, I fear the worst.
I sincerely hope that you are all correct and whilst you certainly provide a fantastic service, anyone who has had sex with a confirmed positive person should be advised to test. An estimated 40,000 people in the US and over 1 million worldwide will contract the virus this year. It is obviously not THAT difficult to transmit despite the fact that I’ve read that nobody on this website has tested positive in 8 years of existence.
I hope that all of you are correct. All I have to cling to is the fact that I had a condom on but why does the CDC and FDA more or less say that condoms are effective but not 100%?
When you have any type of sex with a positive person it surely must be considered a risk that warrants testing? I am fearing the worst and I just know that I have been infected.
How reliable would a PCR be after 8 / 9 days?
When you have any type of sex with a positive person it surely must be considered a risk that warrants testing? I am fearing the worst and I just know that I have been infected.
How reliable would a PCR be after 8 / 9 days?
Do what your Dr. advised you to do. But expect a NEG. test result. And I gaurente you have nothing to worrie about.
You don't need a PCR test- you had PROTECTED sex.
pro·tect verb \prə-ˈtekt\
Definition of PROTECT
transitive verb
1
a : to cover or shield from exposure, injury, damage, or destruction : guard
Condoms are 100% effective when they don't break or slip off- you could NOT have had an exposure.
pro·tect verb \prə-ˈtekt\
Definition of PROTECT
transitive verb
1
a : to cover or shield from exposure, injury, damage, or destruction : guard
Condoms are 100% effective when they don't break or slip off- you could NOT have had an exposure.
Thanks for your reassuring comments.
All of you are very confident that this is a no risk incident but the Doctor over here says that I need to test as the lady was positive. He is adamant that I need to test to be sure. You just never think that something like this will happen to you but I have nobody to blame but myself.
I fear the worst; I have to and it is only human nature to. I will have a PCR test on Monday or Tuesday (8 / 9 days post exposure) and I’ve been told that this will be a very good indicator although not 100% conclusive. Is this correct?
All of you are very confident that this is a no risk incident but the Doctor over here says that I need to test as the lady was positive. He is adamant that I need to test to be sure. You just never think that something like this will happen to you but I have nobody to blame but myself.
I fear the worst; I have to and it is only human nature to. I will have a PCR test on Monday or Tuesday (8 / 9 days post exposure) and I’ve been told that this will be a very good indicator although not 100% conclusive. Is this correct?
You had no HIV risk. So no worries there.
But from now on no more getting drunk and being careless. That is a bad combo for trouble not just health wise.
But from now on no more getting drunk and being careless. That is a bad combo for trouble not just health wise.
You had protected sex, you should have just moved on when you took the condom off. You're wasting your life worrying about a non-issue. Find something more realistic to worry about.
Thank you for your response banded01.
You are right, this happened as a result of alcohol and this has also been an issue in the past. Despite you reassurances, I’m still extremely worried.
Fluid transfer may have happened during hand to genital contact and I don’t believe that I had zero risk. After all, I had sex with a HIV positive person. This is a risk and I am fearing the worst. It is estimated that the HIV rate where I am is as much as 8%. That is staggering and shows that it is transferred quite easily.
I just don’t know what to do. I just can’t say that I had a condom and I’ll be fine. I just know it is not as easy as that. I'm fearing the worst and don't know how I'll get through the next few days.
You are right, this happened as a result of alcohol and this has also been an issue in the past. Despite you reassurances, I’m still extremely worried.
Fluid transfer may have happened during hand to genital contact and I don’t believe that I had zero risk. After all, I had sex with a HIV positive person. This is a risk and I am fearing the worst. It is estimated that the HIV rate where I am is as much as 8%. That is staggering and shows that it is transferred quite easily.
I just don’t know what to do. I just can’t say that I had a condom and I’ll be fine. I just know it is not as easy as that. I'm fearing the worst and don't know how I'll get through the next few days.
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