Hi. I'm an HIV negative woman who is engaged to an HIV + man. His viral load is undetectable and has been for a couple of years. I knew of his condition when I met him. I didn't think I could get involved when the full disclosure was made. We moved very slowly and with great caution. Before we ever had sex I saw his doctor and became fully informed. His doctor said if we practiced sex safely, and he always wore a condom and withdrew prior to ejaculating, that we should be fine. It breaks my heart that technology is available in this country for serodiscordant couples to conceive children of their own, via techniques such as sperm washing, etc. that it is rarely done. In fact, in the state of CA, where we live, it's actually illegal. It's infuriating to me. It seems to me that the HIV undetectable people who are on anti-viral medication and follow it 100% have a chance of living even longer than your average life span. I've been with my fiancee for almost a year now, and not once had he even had a cold! I hate the fact that there is no one I can talk to about this. I live in West Hollywood, so I've met plenty of men is serodiscordant relationships, but no women. I suspect there are many women like me, but in hiding. I have no shame over falling in love with the most wonderful man I've met. He's kind, extremely handsome, very smart, extremely funny and yet there is a huge stigma over our heads. I can't tell anyone at all as naturally HE doesn't tell people. My family would worry. My friends would think I was insane. I feel so alone. Is there anyone else out there like me???? Would love to correspond. Even if you're male and in a monogoumous relationship with someone's who positive and you're not, I'd love to hear from you. It's a very alone place to be in. I'm tired of being alone here.