Dear all. Just wanted to let you know that I received the results of my final 6 months test. It's negative.
I open this new thread because I want to encourage all people who are as worried of getting tested as I were the last 6 months. In fact I was so afraid that I couldn't go for the 3 months test. I suffered for a half year and did not want to believe what all experienced people here, credible websites and doctors told me ever and ever: SYMPTOMS MEAN NOTHING!!
I was convinced my test would be positive. Why? Because I felt guilty, I felt like I deserve it. And I had these symptoms: fatigue, swollen lymph nodes, sudden hearing loss, weight loss, joint pain, rash... Almost all of them diagnosed by myself with the kind help of Dr.Google...
Well, the doctor who just checked me and who is much more knowledgeable, experienced and rational gave me a slightly different diagnosis: the swollen lymph node turned out as a simple muscle node - due to my strained neck that I got after 6 months fear, stress and sitting on front of the computer. What I considered as rash are two ordinary pimples. The joint pain is caused by a teared meniscus. The sudden hearing loss was actually an Eustachian tube dysfunction, an extremely common thing that is not dangerous at all. Weight loss, fatigue, stiff neck - typical stress related symptoms...
It's interesting how one day can completely change your perspective. We are no doctors, our self assessment in such a situation is completely worthless, we don't have the knowledge and the experience and the condition to judge ourselves and our supposed symptoms. And even if we were right, who says that they have to be related? The symptoms of ARS are so non-specific they could be related to anything.
Yes, we heard all this many times before. But I am one of them who were absolutely convinced that their test would be positive. And my risk was real: unprotected anal with a prostitute. I know I was lucky, extremely lucky. But all the symptoms were not related. They were made up by myself or just coincidence.
It was an extreme time. But I also learned a lot. About life and about myself.
I will move on. But I guess I will stay on this board. I am not a doctor and also not an expert about HIV, but I know how it is to be in this situation and maybe I can give some support from time to time.
FInally I want to thank all of the great people who supported me during the last half year. Specially Teak (!!!), Snippets, Xhost, Lizzie Lou, Frank, Uniquelymen, HSci34, Brad and of course Dr HHH and Dr Hook.