I got drunk and had sex with a Thai ladyboy and now I’m terrified

[Cancitizen]

I want to preface this by saying that I appreciate your time and knowledge immensely.

I’ve been in a committed relationship for the last 5 years but my girlfriend went to France for school so I decided to go to Thailand. The first night I got drunk oddly fast probably from the altitude changes and fatigue etc. And I ended up meeting a ladyboy...

I took her back to my hotel room and she had me give her oral without protection. I asked if she had a condom and she said no. So stupid drunk me I did it. I sucked her penis without protection. She then wanted to put her penis in me anally and I said no escpecially not without a condom. So I was drunk enough and embarrassingly horny (embarrassing because previous to this I thought of myself as being completely straight..) that I actually went to 7/11 and bought condoms. I came back and she put it in my butt. And came inside me. She then rather quickly went to the bathroom and immediately flushed the condom. I didn’t even get to see it to make sure that it didn’t brak. I got a quick glimpse of it and it didn’t look broken but I’m not 100% sure.

That was two nights ago and I’ve been terribly anxious and frankly scared. She was not a prostitute, she was 10 years older than me (32) and told me she didn’t have an std when I asked her afterward...

I don’t have any symptoms other than from my anxiety. I sometimes feel like puking but I think that’s just from being so anxious as I have reacted to anxiety like that in the past.


What are the chances that I have an std? How long should I wait before getting tested? I feel so guilty and terrible about myself without really knowing, please help.

[diver58]

It is your guilt, more than your risk that that terrifies you. Since you bought condom yourself, so there may not be any quality issue because you definitely  picked up some international brand.
There is also a very strong possibility that it did not fail because had it failed, it would have been catastrophic and too obvious to ignore.

Unprotected sex either way is not a risk either. Based on these facts, it can safely be assumed that you were not exposed to HIV.

[Cancitizen]

I agree it is my guilt I feel awful. Thank you for your comment.

[AnxiousNoMore]

If a condom fails it is a large rip down the seam and it hangs in tatters so that didn't happen.
You had no risk of HIV and are so safe that you don't need to test.
HIV is instantly inactivated in air and also in saliva which means it is effectively dead so it can't infect from oral activities. It doesn't matter if you and they were actively bleeding or had cuts at the time either because the HIV is effectively dead.

Only adult risks are unprotected penetrating vaginal or anal sex or sharing needles that you inject with but you didn't do that so you had no risk. This sentence is all you need to know to protect yourself against HIV.
Even with blood, lactation, cuts, rashes, burns, etc the air or the saliva does not allow inactivated virus to infect from oral activities. The above HIV science is 40 years old and very well established so nothing you can add will make your situation a risk.
No one got HIV from oral activities in 40 years of HIV history, so likely no one will in the next 40 years of your life either.
There is an std forum for best answers about std.

[Cancitizen]

Thank you very much I appreciate your reply.