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Avatar universal

Please chime in here, fear of HIV is driving my life quality into the sewers!

I will keep this short as I can and will appreciate any help. God bless who ever can give me an opinion and give it to me straight, good or bad.

I had protected insertive anal sex with a latex condom and water based lubricant Aug 22 of 2012 with a strange woman. Additionaly there was fingering (I work with my hands so there are always little scuffs and whatnot on my fingers but they were in decent shape this day, no gashes or anything, maybe papercut sized things) and Analingus with a canker sore on my inner lip. The order of the sex was first analingus, second fingering, third penetrative anal. I also rubbed her clitoris a bit and later wiped precum from my urethra with the same fingers but that was outside in the air, so it was ok right? So the condom did not rip (I would know if it ripped right?) and there was no visible blood from beg. to end. The girl told me she tested neg last test and she tests once a month but I did not see proof and have reason to believe she may engage in risky behavior. She had scars on top of her arm as if she cuts herself with a razor or something, she may have problems. Believe it or not what is worrying me the most about the encounter is the analingus because I pushed my tongue a bit inside and perhaps I took some blood into my mouth even though I did not realize it. Even though most forum members have the attitude that oral sex under normal circumstances equals almost no chance of HIV, I have been reading other official/governmental sites that make it sound like a high risk activity.The good news is I tested HIV negative at 55 days after "exposure" but the bad news is I still feel sicker than hell, swollen neck, swollen and pain behind ears, swollen lump under armpit, swollen groin, headache, warm body, etc, just general malaise. To be fair I have been under constant stress and panic for the past few months. Addtionaly I tested negative for gonhorea (sp) and one other std but I forget which one, and I had a Hepatits vaccine when I was younger. What do you all think? I am not the kind of guy to obsessively ask follow up questions or not accept the advice first time around.
9 Responses
Avatar universal
Oh yeah, I know I said I wont ask follow up stuff but I just wanted to say my ears have been like extremely hot and red, and there is a big lump(the node?) behind the left ear, same side as the lump under my armpit. Also my hands and feet have been really dry and the finger tips have these small little circles of dead skin peeling off. If this is not from hiv any idea from what? The extreme stress?
Avatar universal
NOTHING that you describe put you at risk for an HIV infection. NOTHING.
Avatar universal
Oh really, thats good to know, I am glad about that. I will still test at the three month mark just to satisfy my own crazy head.

One last question, so am I to understand that I can have sex with anyone I want as often as I want and as long as I wear a condom and it doesnt break, I can be sure I will remain HIV negative?

Are the dental dams recommended more for other STD's rather than HIV prevention? Because based on what people say on forums like this one unprotected oral sex is never judged to be a risk or grounds for testing(even though many official people put it at low to medium risk and claim documented cases of transmission)

This will be it for me question wise (sorry but never had good quality sex education in school)
4159949 tn?1350437381
Yes, using a condom protects you from STDs including HIV (the right kind of condom). And yes, you can get chlamydia and gonorrhea from oral sex (in your throat) as well as hpv and hsv, which is what the dental dam is for. I've scoured every HIV forum I can find and all of the doctors say that oral sex is very low risk, so low as to be almost none. I say almost because they must err on the side of caution, but I've never seen a doctor say that they knew of a documented case where the form of HIV transmission occurred through oral sex alone.
Avatar universal
Because HIV is not transmitted by oral sex.
Avatar universal
Thanks people. Extremely nice of you all to help people out.

Teak, one last thing,

When you say matter of factly that HIV is not transmitted by oral sex do you mean under normal circumstances or that it could never happen no matter what variables thrown in.

Don't you think if I someone had a cut on lip or big canker sore and their positive partners semen or blood came into contact with it, it could happen?

JW because I enjoy oral sex and probably couldnt bring myself to use the dental dams. I am willing to take the risk of other stds as long, just do not want HIV.
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