Aa
Please folks get tested, don't sit in a worried hell....
To the people that fear they have HIV
I reached a stage in my life where I was already having thoughts of suicide in my head,I'm from South Africa, I knew I was done for. I made up my mind to stop guessing and get tested. Over the years I had numerous symptoms which still are here: 1. Lymph nodes (preauricular, occipital, axillary, inguinal) 2. Night Sweats 3. Rash inside mouth 4. Ear infections, ringing ears 5. Thrush .My exposures were numerous (25) (protected) vaginal sex with sex workers and unprotected oral (always receiving). I had one condom break with a prostitute from Swaziland,as you know 1 in 4 people are infected there and this took me over the edge and I went in depression and anxiety which also cost me the love of my life.
So I took the plunge I went in and the lady that tested me was kind and caring and we spoke about what I would do if I was positive or negative, better sexual practices and safer sexual relationships, (at this point I already knew it would be positive) She took some blood and placed in on the rapid test, as it was changing she hid it coz I pulled over to see. Then she asked me if I was ready and I said yes, she said I was NEGATIVE!!!!!! I broke down and cried, she did another just for me, that was negative also.. Nine years of pain and torture to myself, I was free not because of being HIV+ but because I now knew. If was it either I made a decision I was going to look after myself. I have such a weight taken off me, I feel free not because I'm negative but because I know have this fear gone away. Next stop was the nearest clinic where I went through a full STD screening including HIV which will be out on Monday.
SO WHAT I'M SAYING TO EVERYONE IS, GET TESTED THE FEAR WILL KILL YOU MORE THAN HIV ITSELF. THE MIND IS A MYSTERIOUS CREATURE AND SO IS STRESS... I'VE BEEN ON THIS FORUM READING POSTS FOR 5 YEARS, AND ONLY A TEST COULD HAVE HELPED ME. TODAY MY NEW LIFE BEGINS AND I'M GOING TO VOLUNTEER WITH HIV AIDS ORGANIZATIONS.
Love life even if you are negative or positive.
I reached a stage in my life where I was already having thoughts of suicide in my head,I'm from South Africa, I knew I was done for. I made up my mind to stop guessing and get tested. Over the years I had numerous symptoms which still are here: 1. Lymph nodes (preauricular, occipital, axillary, inguinal) 2. Night Sweats 3. Rash inside mouth 4. Ear infections, ringing ears 5. Thrush .My exposures were numerous (25) (protected) vaginal sex with sex workers and unprotected oral (always receiving). I had one condom break with a prostitute from Swaziland,as you know 1 in 4 people are infected there and this took me over the edge and I went in depression and anxiety which also cost me the love of my life.
So I took the plunge I went in and the lady that tested me was kind and caring and we spoke about what I would do if I was positive or negative, better sexual practices and safer sexual relationships, (at this point I already knew it would be positive) She took some blood and placed in on the rapid test, as it was changing she hid it coz I pulled over to see. Then she asked me if I was ready and I said yes, she said I was NEGATIVE!!!!!! I broke down and cried, she did another just for me, that was negative also.. Nine years of pain and torture to myself, I was free not because of being HIV+ but because I now knew. If was it either I made a decision I was going to look after myself. I have such a weight taken off me, I feel free not because I'm negative but because I know have this fear gone away. Next stop was the nearest clinic where I went through a full STD screening including HIV which will be out on Monday.
SO WHAT I'M SAYING TO EVERYONE IS, GET TESTED THE FEAR WILL KILL YOU MORE THAN HIV ITSELF. THE MIND IS A MYSTERIOUS CREATURE AND SO IS STRESS... I'VE BEEN ON THIS FORUM READING POSTS FOR 5 YEARS, AND ONLY A TEST COULD HAVE HELPED ME. TODAY MY NEW LIFE BEGINS AND I'M GOING TO VOLUNTEER WITH HIV AIDS ORGANIZATIONS.
Love life even if you are negative or positive.
Just got a call from the Doc all results are negative... :)
Just wish I did this earlier, but its a new beginning...
Just wish I did this earlier, but its a new beginning...
Nine years of unnecessary pain, what a waste of time... But of course late is better than never. :)
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