Risk of hiv from bareback grinding

[davetimmons]

I feel like such an idiot for even having to ask this question. A few weeks ago i hired a massage therapist for a sensual massage. as the massage proceeded the guy began grinding against me with his fully erect and uncercimsized penis. it felt good and i did not stop him.  he was a little rough and was grinding and stabbing my anus a little, but i am not sure he penetrated.  it is possible his penis head briefly penetrated but i dont know for sure.  I am really worried for two obvious reasons:

1) first, i had been sufferng from some hemeroids of some sort for a few weeks and had a few incidents of light blood on a tissue after using the toilet. after our encouter i had a little blood again on the tissue. I am very worried that perhaps he got precum on my exposed area.

2) obviously i am worried about the risk of hiv from the precum in my anus.  he was ucut and i understand that thge risk is even greater in this case.  

it has been about 3 weeks and this morning my throat begin to feel swelled. i have no toher symptoms but now i am of course panicked.  this was a stupid mistake on my part and i dont know what to do.  i am not sure how soon i can get tested for hiv and i am scared to death.  

thank you for any insights.

[davetimmons]

thanks lizzie.  i just wanted to be clear, it was not mutual masturbation i was worried about.  it was the fairly aggressive grinding of his penis against my anus for 2-3 mins and the fact that it probably dipped in a few times a 1/2 inch or so and that at the time i apparently had an active anal fissure as i noticed blood on the toilet paper about an hour later that has had me so worries.

but i hear you.  i am going in next week for the 28 day test, i really apreciate everyone in the community's support.  the swollen throat and fever i have had the past 36 hours have basicaly panicked me.  

[joggen]

Hello Dr.

A few days ago I was involved in an out of character(for me) incident with another male. We were performing mutual masterbation/frottage in a public toilet. The guy dispensed some liquid handsoap and rubbed it onto his penis and then tried to penetrate me. His penis kept on slipping away from my butt hole but he did push up against it directly a couple of times.This lasted for approx. 10-15 seconds before I came to my senses and stopped him. I am 99% sure he did not penetrate me but am scared that he had pre-cum and managed to place this just inside(say 1/4") my anus.
I do have a heamorroid but it was not playing up at that time.

My questions are:

1. What is your assessment of my risk
2. Would the very cold(it was freezing /frosty outside) soap soln. de-activate the virus in any pre-cum and lower my risk

I know I had a major mis-judgement and am determined not to let this happen again, as the worry is just not worth it.

Thanks.


Edward W Hook, MD
Dec 09, 2010
Welcome to the Forum. If there was no penetration there is no risk.  That some of your partner's pre-ejaculatory fluid may have gotten on your anus and/or come in contact with your hemorrhoid does not change this. If this was the extent of your exposure, you do not need to be concerned and do not need testing.

The soap solution, irrespective of the temperature would tend to kill any virus present.  Lower temperature might facilitate killing but the soap itself would be rapidly lethal for the virus as well.  

Hope this helps.  EWH

[LIZZIE LOU]

UPDATE:

"Welcome to our Forum.  HIV is not spread through mutual masturbation despite the fact that is is typical for person masturbating each other to get each others' genital secretions on one another as they do.   The virus is not transmitted in this way. That you may have a fissure or cut at your anus in the region where his secretions may have been does not change this.  Nor does the possibility that the irritation/cut you noticed may have been from his finger nail. "  DR HOOK

"Welcome to the Forum.  I'll try to help by expanding slightly on what you've already heard from Teak, Rainlover and others on the HIV Prevention Community site. As they note, the "exposure" you describe was no risk whatsoever for HIV transmission- none at all. There has never been a case of HIV transmitted in the context of massage or mutual masturbation despite the facts that it is common for persons engaged in such activities to get each other’s' genital secretions on one another.  This is the case even with sores, cuts and hemorrhoids in place.  Duration makes no difference either."  DR HOOK

"Welcome to the Forum.  I am pleased to assure you that the activities you describe are no risk for HIV.  HIV is not transmitted by either masturbation, even anal masturbation, or analingus.  That you had active hemorrhoids at the time of your activities does not change this- still not risk.  DR HOOK

[joggen]

This HIV Community discusses HIV Prevention based upon the criteria established by MedHelp’s doctors who are world renowned in their field. Your doctors don't know what they are talking about.

[davetimmons]

Update:
Hey all, i just wanted to share the update i received today from the mens clinic in los angeles. i wanted to share because i think that in an attempt to asuage unfounded fears honestly, some folks on this list may go way to far in asserting how "safe" an act may have been. as you can see from the above thread i was basically castigated for coming back with my concerns about exposure to HIV infected precum with an exposed anal fissure caused either from hemmeroids or intense anal stabbing/granding.

the clinic folks said indeed i should come in and be tested. while this was a "low risk" it was by no means a "no risk" as the fact remains, if he was HIV + and his precum came into contact with my exposed anal fissures, i am at risk. low risk is not no risk.

again, i dont want to be argumentative and i am grateful for the folks who dedicated their time to helping people like me.  but in my case, being told i had "no risk" was apparently just not accurate.  In fact, the folks at the clinic were quite clear that had i called immediately after they would have recommended pep.

just something to add to this community stream.  as ai said i am grateful for the time everyone spends on this site helping the less informed.

[davetimmons]

teak, my apologies.  i was just terrified when i got the answer in my inbox. i certainly dont want to run afoul of the community guidelines.

[Teak]

That doctor is a quack.

* Anyone who continues to post excessively, questioning a conclusively negative result or no-risk situation, will be subject to action by MedHelp. Conclusively negative results or a no-risk situation will be based upon the criteria established by MedHelp’s doctors. Action will be taken as follows:
    * After excessive posting, a warning will be issued by MedHelp
    * Continuing to post regarding the negative result / no risk situation will result in a 3 day suspension
    * Continuing to post upon your return will result in a permanent ban.

[davetimmons]

hey all, i just received the following note from a dr on one of those post a question fee based sites.  i was feeling pretty good based on everyone's feedback here until the dr wrote the following:  

"If the precum comes in contact with an open anal fissure then the chances of transmission do increase many fold. I suggest you get tested immediately"

So, I am now back to full scale panic.  ugh.  are there any drs on this site who weigh in?

[davetimmons]

thanks lizzie.  i guess i am just a little surprised to hear such insistent answers.  google had me basically freaked out.  i read multiple sites where "drs" answered that precum on exposed anal fissures (hemmeroids) "could" transmit hiv.  i also read uncut men were much more likely to be ablw to transmit hiv from precum and possible dipping because it keeps the air from contacting the precum.  so i was in a panic.  i really appreciate your confidence.

[LIZZIE LOU]

feeling stupid doesn't create a risk except in your head.

as joggen has advised...you had no risk...NONE ! ! !

[davetimmons]

thanks for the comments - i really appreciate it.  i had read that HIV infected precum that came into contact with exposed anal fissures from hemmeroids could transmit hiv.  that was what had me freaked.  

mainly i just feel stupid for allowing a dangerous situation to have ever occurred.  also, what i meant by "unsure" was that i did not know if his head had penetrated in.  it felt likeit might have slightly.  there is not way he slid all the way in, it would have killed me.   thanks again.

[joggen]

"but i am not sure he penetrated.  it is possible his penis head briefly penetrated but i dont know for sure."

Your words. You are not sure whether he penetrated. If you were penetrated you would have known. Hemorrhoids are not a route of exposure- transmission requires penetration. You were not penetrated.

[davetimmons]

well, if his penis head pushed inside me but not the whole thing would that have counted - i had thought it would.  he was enormous so i agree i would have felt it if the whole penis went in.  any worry about the hemeroid bleeding around the area? he did grind me for a good 2-3 minutes.

[joggen]

Transmission requires penetration, and if you were penetrated you would definitely have recognized it and remembered it. No risk for HIV.