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Waiting for HIV test results? So afraid.. Could I have it...?

Hey guys, 

So about a week ago I posted on my fears in regard to having herpes. You can check that out on my posting board.
Long story again just for fill in.
Hooked up with this guy a few fridays ago, made out, some oral, he wanted to “bust” on my face but I was like no... never been a swallower but he ejaculated and I only took a little into my mouth and then spat it out bc it was salty and I didn’t enjoy it at all(no taste different from any other semen I have experienced).
Before we hooked up he went on his spiel urged me not to worry because he would never hook up with a girl if he had anything that could harm them w/o notifying them & his penis looked “normal” bc I liked this kid, I obliged, I’ve known him for a while and he doesn’t seem like the “skeezy” type to just get head and be okay with the transference of an STI  to anyone and everyone (but some people lie you never know...)
The Sunday night after we’d hooked up, I fell ill; tight throat, swollen glands, pus pockets on my tonsils, fever etc...
Went to the docs office took a rapid strep test, turned out that I was positive for strep
My fears escalate b/c I was worried that he had lied that he had given me something
Was treated with azythromax (not to sure if spelt right) just to be cautious, tested NEG for gonno and chlym a few days later (Thank God)
The strep cleared up after 7 days of amoxicillin 500 mg dosage 3x a day for 7 days
Day 4 of those antibiotics though, I began to experience itching all over my body with NO SIGNS OF A RASH
Fearful again I went to my family doctor; had blood work done for ALL STI’s and...even HIV
My symptoms are fatigue, overall body itch with no rash, lower back pain and my history of anxiety clearly doesn’t help this situation...
I’ve been put onto 50mg dosages 1x a day of a prescribed anti-inflammatory which has been a blessing and ease a lot of the itching pain, my doctor fears I am suffering from amoxi-mono itch meaning I was wrongfully diagnosed for strep when I may have had mono (or potentially had both) and it’s causing an allergic reaction in my body
I’m so afraid right now because I webMD’d and started to look for every symptom in the bible and some led me even to HIV
I’m glad I already put in blood work with my doctors but I have to wait two more days for some proper results and it’s eating me alive to a point where it’s become unmanageable...I can’t believe that a pointless blowjob has put my entire life at risk...I feel sleazy and trashy, like I’ve made the biggest mistake of my life
My anxiety has gotten so bad that I’m actually deferred from my final exams this week and idk what to do with myself until I get my results
Tomorrow I will go for a rapid HIV test at the province sexual health clinic and I’m so afraid I’ll test positive
What can I do to help in the mean time? What have some of you done in this case?
Please guys I’m praying for guidance, I am so afraid and don’t know how I could live with this in my life.
4 Responses
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Avatar universal
Fear, precaution, and proactiveness.
Like anyone in my case I am fearful of potential outcome. Everyone should take precautions and if precaution is hindered then don't hide from the truth, get answers by being proactive.
I can't hide from this and I'm going to be proactive to protect & save MY life and maybe even somebody else's.
I'm aware of my risks, I am not being ignorant to what the outcomes may be and I'm being PROACTIVE.
Getting tested is smart for everyone and and I think it's ignorant for you to onto my post with your negative attitude.
Please leave. Thank you.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
If you had no risk then why are you testing?Saliva inhibits HIV transmission.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Teak.
I am praying that everything you say here is true.
I understand there is ALWAYS slight risk with any type of sex and contracting an STI/D or HIV.
But this post is something I am believing in, maybe out of naivety, maybe out of hope.
You are the reason I will be sleeping tonight.

Thank you will let you know results of my rapid tomorrow...
Regards and all my blessings,

ConfusedandScared94
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
You never had an exposure.

Oral sex.
No incident HIV infections among MSM who practice exclusively oral sex.
Int Conf AIDS 2004 Jul 11-16; 15:(abstract no. WePpC2072)??Balls JE, Evans JL, Dilley J, Osmond D, Shiboski S, Shiboski C, Klausner J, McFarland W, Greenspan D, Page-Shafer K?University of California, San Francisco, San Francisco, United States

Oral transmission of HIV, reality or fiction? An update
J Campo1, MA Perea1, J del Romero2, J Cano1, V Hernando2, A Bascones1
Oral Diseases (2006) 12, 219–228

AIDS: Volume 16(17) 22 November 2002 pp 2350-2352
Risk of HIV infection attributable to oral sex among men who have sex with men and in the population of men who have sex with men

Page-Shafer, Kimberlya,b; Shiboski, Caroline Hb; Osmond, Dennis Hc; Dilley, Jamesd; McFarland, Willie; Shiboski, Steve Cc; Klausner, Jeffrey De; Balls, Joycea; Greenspan, Deborahb; Greenspan
Page-Shafer K, Veugelers PJ, Moss AR, Strathdee S, Kaldor JM, van Griensven GJ. Sexual risk behavior and risk factors for HIV-1 seroconversion in homosexual men participating in the Tricontinental Seroconverter Study, 1982-1994 [published erratum appears in Am J Epidemiol 1997 15 Dec; 146(12):1076]. Am J Epidemiol 1997, 146:531-542.

Studies which show the fallacy of relying on anecdotal evidence as opposed to carefully controlled study insofar as HIV transmission risk is concerned:

Jenicek M. "Clinical Case Reporting" in Evidence-Based Medicine. Oxford: Butterworth–Heinemann; 1999:117
Saltzman SP, Stoddard AM, McCusker J, Moon MW, Mayer KH. Reliability of self-reported sexual behavior risk factors for HIV infection in homosexual men. Public Health Rep. 1987 102(6):692–697.Nov–Dec;

Catania JA, Gibson DR, Chitwood DD, Coates TJ. Methodological problems in AIDS behavioral research: influences on measurement error and participation bias in studies of sexual behavior. Psychol Bull. 1990 Nov;108(3):339–362.

There is no debate (among experts) about the HIV risks associated with oral sex. The risk is so low that almost nobody who cares for HIV infected patients has ever had a patient believed to have been infected that way. Among experts, it's a semantic issue about using terms like "no risk" and "very low risk". There is no difference between my or Dr. Hook's use of "low risk" and other experts' "no risk".
DR. HANSFIELD

"And oral sex is basically safe sex -- completely safe with respect to HIV and although not zero risk for other STDs, the chance of infection is far lower than for unprotected vaginal or anal sex. Please educate yourself about the real risks. If you stick with oral sex and condom-protected vaginal or anal sex, you have no HIV worries and very little worry about other STDs. " DR HANSFIELD

"I am sure you can find lots of people who believe that HIV is transmitted by oral sex, but you will not find scientific data to support this unrealistic concern..." DR HOOK

"HIV is not spread by touching, masturbation, oral sex or condom protected sex."- DR. HOOK

in the public HIV Prevention forum of MedHelp, TEAK and the other moderators maintain that oral sex in all forms is a zero risk activity. Would you agree with this assessment?
I TOTALLY AGREE / DR GARCIA
"HIV is not spread by masturbation, through oral sex, through kissing or other casual contact." Dr. Hook
"The observation on thousands and thousands of observations is that HIV is not spread by oral sex (of any sort)." DR HOOK
"I would not say your risk ,if he had HIV is "slim to none"- that's too high.  I would say they are effectively zero.  How much of his ejaculate or other genital  secretions you may have swallowed makes no difference.  EWH "
"As far as HIV is concerned, there is no known risk of getting HIV from performing oral sex on an infected partner, even if that person's genital secretions get into your eyes or if you swallow." Dr.Hook
HIV is not spread by oral sex, giving or receiving, even if sores, gum disease or blood is present
DR HOOK
The fact is that there are no cases in which HIV has been proven to be transmitted by oral sex, including fellatio..  EWH
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