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Avatar universal

am dieng..PLZ i want to hear from all of u....

am writing u now and i feel sooooo sad and my b cry..
am sooo worried...
i have many previous experiences in my life show me how am unlucky guy!
in my study all ppl was succeed and me only who get fail!
and many other situations,,,

AM afraid same happen to me with HIV...

am 28 yr male...
i had Unprotected oral about 4 times...females was sucking me..
2 of them was b4 i get my semen,,
other 2 was after i finish so my penis is sleeping..

i remember i licked one of them too unprotected..:(

i had 2 time protected vaginal...(i remember that i saw my semen in the condom after i finished so it didn't break..

all this was about 1 yr b4 i have no health problems..
i was living normal life..
BUT it changed when i began to surf the web about HIV...
an i heard on of females was infected...

plz plz plz..i need to hear of u all..and especially of ppl was in my status who deal with poz females...and got tested..

HOW risky am??
i can't go to test,.,,am soooo afraid....
plz help...
48 Responses
Avatar universal
172023 tn?1334675884
You are not dying, at least not of HIV.  If all you had was oral sex, and protected vaginal sex, you have nothing to worry about.

HIV is spread by unprotected vaginal or anal sex with an HIV + person, by sharing injection equipment with HIV + persons, or by receiving a blood transfusion from an HIV + person.  If you did none of those things, you need not worry.

Avatar universal
No risk you had protected sex . Oral doesn't give you HIV
Avatar universal
my freinds..
am afraid ur talks are built on what u read on net...as i got but still afraid...
when i call lab..
they say (unprotected (vaginal,anal,oral) MUST test..it is risky!

Do u know anyone in life had my situation?and my feelings?
may times i think..(what about i didn't clean my penis quickly...it may transmitt..and so on!
am sorry my freinds,,but am afraid
Avatar universal
am afraid..all ppl say no risk cuz which built on statistics of america...canda..
Avatar universal
And what is wrong with those statistics.  They happen to be accurate.  Your risk of exposure was just about zero!
Avatar universal
thanks for reply...

i want to hear from someone contact with POZ or POZ contacted with NEG in my circumstances..

all ppl have case like me and come here..they don't come back when they get their results!
Avatar universal

>when i call lab..

Ah, well, no commercial interest in them telling you to test, was there? Heck no. How much are you going to pay for these blood workups, BTW? If this is not a for profit venture, then they are certainly wildly off the mark in terms of when to test.

You supposed risk was not a risk. You had protected sex. Ok, smart thing to do. Know why? Because it pretty much guarantees that you did not catch HIV as a result of it. As for oral sex, to my knowledge this is not a risk for contracting HIV.

How do I know this? Well, as you said, I have researched quite a bit on the Internet. But, I have also spoken to an assortment of ID doctors, nurses, etc. who have told me basically the same thing. Ok, so, based on my own experiences, I would say you don't have anything to worry about.

Now, why did I run around doing all of this research? Because, I was once standing right in your shoes. I, too, once was very worried that unprotected oral sex might have given me HIV. That didn't happen, and I have the tests to prove it. Thing is, once I finally figured out I didn't have HIV, I was still interested in the topic, thus, I stuck around the forums, if only to help others bypass the months of needless anxiety I went through.

Thing is, I can say all of this until I am blue in the face, it is up to you to believe it. If you remain concerned about all of this, go ahead and test. Doesn't hurt anything. However, dial back on your drama meter, and your anxiety: you did not catch HIV from the situations you have described. It just didn't happen. And your negative test will prove that. After all, you will be testing to help with your peace of mind, not because you had any chance at all of having contracted HIV. And that's a fact.
Avatar universal
They don't come back after they get their negative result.  Based on your exposure, you don't even need testing but just like everyone else you will test at 6 weeks and then again at 3 months. Feel free to come back and post your negative test results.
Avatar universal
this is governmental lab..for free..
BUT i felt the one answered me in understand NOTHING..
he only say what in papers written by his boss ppl..

BUT am afraid..u might had oral with NEG one..and am unlucky with POZ...
and the more exposures i did make me feel more afraid..

did u get what i feel my freind?
Avatar universal

I get what you feel, but what I wrote isn't based on feelings, it is based on fact. There is a distinction, a rather important one, to be made there. Now, perhaps we can get down to brass tacks on this, since you brought up the subject of feelings. Specifically, it might help you to remember this: however you are feeling at the moment (guilty, afraid, confused, anguished, fearful) really has very little do with whether or not you contracted HIV from the "exposures" that you have described.

In fact, how you feel has nothing to do with your HIV status. And, the simple fact is this: however you are feeling, you did not catch HIV from anything you described. So, go ahead, feel afraid, feel nervous, feel guilty. Lord knows, I felt all of those things during my own period of anxiety. I am merely pointing out to you that, perhaps, you are suffering through this needlessly. As in, since you did not catch HIV, why put yourself through all of this?

As I said, I do understand where you are coming from, and I know it is very difficult to be rational during a time like this. No shame in being afraid. But, I presume you came here for advice, so that is what I am giving you. First, calm down. Second, do yourself a favor and take a time out from the maelstrom in your head. Easier said than done, I know, but not impossible. Take five minutes, tell yourself, it's just for you, not for your fears, nor your anxieties, but just clear your head of everything. You can do it.

In those five minutes, process what everyone is telling you now. No risk, none. No risk, none. You are freaking out needlessly, because you had no risk, none. Try that for a while, and then see how you feel. Once you have done so, then come back and tell me how you feel about all of this.

Actually, when you come back, I would also like you to describe everything that you are feeling at this point. Fear, OK, no need to go into that, because that is obvious. But, how about guilt? Maybe? Also, do you have OCD, diagnosed or not (anyone who has it eventually knows that they do). Tell me that.
Avatar universal
In case you didnt see it in the other response:

don't think I would put a negative spin on your casusal partner's knowledge about the low risk of STD transmission by oral sex (the idea that because she knows, she might be infected).  Rather, I would just assume she's a smart lady who understands the health implications of her chosen lifestyle.  Anyway, she is correct about the low risk of STD transmission.

1) Zero risk for HIV, even if your partner was infected, which she probably is not.  Some risk of nongonococcal urethritis (NGU) due to oral bacteria.  Theoretical risk of gonorrhea, but too low to worry about - especially since if you get gonorrhea, you will know it by symptoms (penile discharge etc) within a few days.  Also theoretical risk of herpes due to HSV-1, but also very low in reality.  

2) Get tested if you develop symptoms.  Otherwise don't worry about it.

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