I feel stupid even writing this now.I am fearful you will have a low opinion of me.
I am so down right now, I cant stop crying. I dont know if this is just tx related, or if it is just a already existing problem that is now surfacing.
I hate my job, and no, its not just "the job" its how they have always treated me,....very bad to say the least. Now this hepc problem, Im dependent on the job for the insurance, no insurance, no tx. I need the money, Im not college educated like many of you, just a working slob. Nobody would guess to look at me that I have self esteem issues, I am a fantastic actress. Even my own husband has no idea how often during the day I fixate on my life, I am an under achiever, and feel trapped in my life. If I quit the job, I lose my vehicle (big pymnts) I live in a one horse town, no public transportation. I pay most the bills, and Im not getting any younger. Im sorry for bothering you all with this, I dont want to tell anybody this, b/c they would just say I need help, I dont want to be on meds for depression, I dont even like docs, I dont know what to do, I dont feel there is really an answer out there that "fits" me and my situation. I am a convenience store manger, and most of the time we are treated like the scum of the earth, I have lousy employees, and am expected to pick up their slack, I am to tired to do this. I am sorry to burden you with this. No, college is not an option for me, no money, make to much to qualify for anything, there seems to be no real options, I have thought of everything.