Cold sore --

[Evaa__]

Hi. So I've been very scared lately. I recall having a cold sore years ago, when I was in the seventh grade; considering that I've only kissed one boy, and I've only been with that boy since then. I am not sexually active. But I don't remember ever seeing him have a cold sore on his lip; plus i was the only girl he has ever kissed. But recently I've been thinking about it a lot (I'm not sure if it was actually a cold sore either, I don't remember it blistering up, scabbing or peeling off.. And it was never in clusters) I am afraid that I have herpes. I am also scared that one day, when I get married I will give my partner herpes because of a cold sore I had when I was 11 years old. I never really thought much about it, until now because soon I will be getting my blood tested, and I'm afraid that my mother will think something else; but I couldn't really control getting a "cold sore"... I'm just afraid. Is it common that I will pass it to my husband in the future? I've been with the same boy for a few years, I only had one or two cold sores. But recently I've been getting little pimples(blackheads that I pick at) around my lips. I've been kissing the same boy for god knows how long... So is it possible that he's already immune to it? I've never seen him with a cold sore. I don't know how i got my first cold sore either. I feel like i'm diseased, and I have stds. I've never had sex, I only kissed one boy, and occasionally share drinks with my mom. But I'm not sure. I'm just afraid that it will come up in the tests, and i'm more afraid that I will pass it on to my boyfriend in the future. I know cold sores are common, but i feel dirty. I know plenty of celebrities have cold sores, I've even had a few teachers that had cold sores; and a few of my friends too. I just feel so low about it. I never thought much about it, I thought it was normal; until i started googling and found out it was herpes. Is there any way that you can get a cold sore from something else, and not herpes? I just need some reassurance that everything is okay. All answers welcome, thank you.  

[Evaa__]

But does that mean that I will end up spreading it to my partner? I haven't had a cold sore since. And I've never seen that he had a cold sore before... So should I really stress spreading it to him; I rarely ever get cold sores.... He's never gotten one, even though we've been together for a long time. In the future will this affect my sex life in any way?

[kitty657]

Honestly, it would be a good thing if you have oral herpes. I will explain my reasoning... Having HSV1 orally will pretty much protect you from getting it genitally once you have the antibodies built up (which takes around 3-6 months). So many kids are getting genital HSV1 nowadays because they were never exposed to the virus as children.

[Fleetwood20]

Please do not buy into any paranoia or stigma associated with oral herpes.

This is one of the world's most common viruses.

It is likely that you have it, simply because of the high proportion of the population that has it.

Not every ailment with your lips is therefore herpes though. If you are having some issues, then see a doctor for treatment and appropriate care of your lips.

There is no need to test for HSV1 if you do not feel like it. By all means tell partners that you get cold sores on your lips on the rare occasion and you should avoid contact during those times, but apart from that there is nothing more expected of you.

There is no need to feel dirty or similar. Over 60% of the world's population... 4 billion people!!... have oral HSV1. They aren't 'dirty' in any way. On that basis wouldn't you argue that the 2 billion people without HSV1 are 'dirty'?? See its all just a bit of silly nonsense. This is a normal human virus that people have empathy for.

You should too, empathy for yourself and others and just be open about it and how you'll be taking care of them to the best of your ablities.