I have a problem . I met a girl a few weeks ago, she has HSV 1 and gets cold sores once or twice a year.
Three weeks ago, she had one (2 day old ) and she allowed me to kiss her,, I couldn't see anything, she shifted her mouth sideways so as not to make contact with the sore . She told me afterwards, we shouldn't kiss while she had this. I had read a bit on the subject and freaked out but kept my cool . A few days later she kissed me again on the cheek ! I didn't have time to say no thanks. We also had sex and I made the mistake to tell her to use her saliva. Almost three weeks have passed and so far I haven't had a cold sore like what I can see on Google.
I read some of the posts here and it sounds as though I should not worry too much. I saw her again and wanted to avoid kissing her although the sore was healed but I did it anyway because I could not help having sex with her again. As I was very worried about shedding I rinse my mouth with copious amounts of apple cider vinegar, not sure if it does anygood but can't hurt. It actually kind of burned my mouth and I noticed I had vey small vesicles on the lips, mainly upper, they show as white spots and are visible only when I push with my tongue to stretch the skin, my guess is they are underneath several layers of skin . I looked at that, and thought I have had this before. It doesn't show when my lips are just closed . I doesn't hurt, doesn't tingle nothing. I only paid attention to it since I have been checking myself like crazy for weeks. But it does look like herpes, although there is no weeping.
Now I have kissed dozens of girls in bars , sometimes in the dark , never with a sore but chances are I have been exposed. It would be great if I already had and had no symptoms other than what I just described. However I don't know and don't want to take any chance of getting a real cold sore or genital herpes. Because this is a casual relationship, I don't know what to do . I thought about ending it but since we would stay friends we would still kiss on the cheek and I will still freak out every time. I have not wanted to discuss the matter with her because I don't want to be the bearer of bad news and make her feel guilty but it looks like I am going to have to. If I break it up like that she will suspect it's because of the herpes and that's not nice. So I have considered maintaining this relationship since anyway we woudl kiss on the cheek. Is a kiss on the lips with no tongue a lot more risky than on the cheek ?
How can I tell her of my concern without making her feel miserable ? Can I still get sores in the event I have been exposed in the past and can I have gential herpes as well ? I am willing to forego oral for me but still like to give and if we can't kiss , that 's ridiculous.
And what do I do if there is a chance I have it ? Am I supposed to tell every girl I give oral to, there is a chance I have HSV 1 ? That's ridiculous ...