Background: I am a 25yo female. I have incredibly severe health anxiety and depression (diagnosed).
In January 2018, my current "partner" (we have never engaged in actual intercourse) was diagnosed with GHSV2 from one active lesion that appeared and was immediately swabbed. This was after multiple instances of unprotected intercourse (Oct 2016) with someone who had previously tested negative. A full year prior to the lesion appearing, (January 2017), he had what we now consider to be his first outbreak. Then there were no lesions but he had trouble urinating, slight pain when urinating, weak stream, and a low grade fever for about a month. He is not on daily therapy and only takes the acyclovair when experiencing an outbreak. He has had 3 instances in the last year of ONE lesion appearing in the same place, directly on his penis.
I had a blood test for HSV1 and HSV2 and tested negative soon after his diagnosis, though we have only ever had hand-to-genital (careful to avoid touching with fluids from the other party, always wash hands afterward) and minimal oral-to-genital contact. I've never had any kind of oral or genital symptom.
For the past few weeks, I have been under extreme stress with work/family. I have endometriosis and PMDD, so my PMS was in full swing. More sugar and chocolate than actual food, somewhat dehydrated, etc. A couple of times in the last 5 years I have also experienced UTIs, that I believe just improved on their own and didn't require medical treatment, but involved burning/urgency with urination, etc. and came in conjunction with my period to some extent.
This past weekend, he used his hand on me manually. He was not experiencing an outbreak, had not previously touched himself whatsoever that he can recall, and remained fully clothed the entire time. It was what I would consider more "aggressive" touching than usual. I was expecting my period, which came Sunday morning. Monday morning, I awoke with severe urgency/burning on urination and immediately freaked out. My partner then told me he noticed one lesion on his buttock (fully covered by his clothing) on Saturday night but had assumed it was a bug bite. More appeared by Monday morning leading him to believe it might be an outbreak. Therefore, my symptoms appeared 2 days after our contact, and he began to itch 24 hours after our contact.
My anxiety is now overwhelming. I am still experiencing slight burning/pain when urinating and slight urgency off and on. AZO otc meds for UTI pain relief were very effective, but made a UTI test at the doctor inconclusive. I've read about many cases when urethritis can occur even without enough bacteria to "register" on a standard UTI test for bacteria, but I've of course also read about "UTI" symptoms actually being a primary HSV2 outbreak. I am beside myself. My urine culture will not be back until Monday and I am afraid it will be negative for bacteria, thus leaving my anxiety with the only conclusion of HSV2.
THANK YOU for taking the time to read and help me.
Bottom line is, I would like to know:
1) What is my risk of transmission via infected male touching my vaginal area/urethra with presumed clean hands and no "active" lesions anywhere. Again, we have never had ANY penile/vaginal contact whatsoever.
Thank you so much.