Actually, yes, the IgM is that useless, and many in the medical community are totally unaware of this and continue to order this test. I'm including links at the bottom that you can read for more info on this. My own IgM tests were wrong - it was negative when it should have been positive, and positive when it should have been negative.
Since you have tested negative on the IgG 12 weeks after the exposure, you do not have herpes. You can test out to 16 weeks if you feel you must, but the chances the results changing are very slim.
I don't know what the red spot on your labia was. Given that it lasted 6 hours, I'd guess it was some sort of irritation. Herpes symptoms last at least a week, give or take. No STD symptoms would clear in 6 hours.
If you have neither type 1 or type 2, and became infected with hsv2, the chances of you getting a severe primary outbreak are good. Not everyone does, but since you have no antibodies to either type, you'd be far more likely to have a really bad first outbreak.
I'm with your second doctor and don't think you have herpes. However, even if you ever get it, I'm more concerned about your mental health, since you are considering suicide as an option. I've had herpes for over 15 years, and I promise you that it's not even close to worth ending your life over. It's a blip in my life, nothing more.
I urge you to consider counseling. Medical unknowns are stressful, but responding with suicidal thoughts suggests that anxiety is an issue for you. I say this with only compassion, and no judgement. Please consider getting some help. If you need resources - https://www.iasp.info/resources/Crisis_Centres/
Info about the IgM test -
https://westoverheights.com/herpes/the-updated-herpes-handbook/ - "IgM (a different kind of antibody) tests do not accurately distinguish between the types of virus nor can they accurately tell a new infection from an old one. IgM tests also may pick up other herpes viruses, like chicken pox or mono virus. IgM tests for herpes should be avoided completely until better ones are available. Many clinicians don’t realize that the IgM test is not good for diagnosing people, and tell people, based on an IgM test, that they have herpes. And not only that, they tell them have new herpes infection because IgM, with other viruses, comes up early in infection. But with herpes, IgG and IgM come up around the same time. The IgM can be generated years after first infection and will be detectable periodically. There are also commonly false positives on the IgM test. A person might have an IgM test and four months later, still be IgG negative. The IgG is the only test you ever want for herpes, never ever IgM."
Hang in there. You're going to be okay.
Thank you auntiejessie, really appreciate your response. I am just in fear of my own body now because of this positive IgM! I have reunited with an ex boyfriend and we are now in a committed relationship and I would be mortified if I infected (his IgG is negative for both).
Do we have statistics on how many people who are positive on IgM go on to seroconvert to IgG?
Also, 3 days ago I have a new weird symptom - the skin on my clitoris is peeling off (not the clitoral hood but the clitoris itself). No pain, no itching or burning urination - just peeling skin. I googled of course and couldn't find much but the 3 similar things I found online all said 'herpes'!! Is this a typical herpes symptom? Is this my first outbreak? I'm trying to get an appointment with my doc.
I'm living everyday in fear now, my sex life has taken a hit and I'm contemplating leaving my partner so I don't burden his life. I can't work and I've gone from being a real social, productive person to being a couch potato. I don't understand how to gain acceptance after being told by my first doctor that I have the virus. Maybe it serves me right for being a **** and sleeping with 2 new people after a 6 year monogamous relationship. But I just can't get this past my head, I really can't doesn't matter who I talk to :(
auntiejessie - thank you! I had another chat with my partner on the weekend and he really is adamant on staying with me regardless what my results end up being which is great!
I am still concerned after a weekend full of symptoms. Had sex on Friday night. Next morning woke up with a red spot, which was raised, on my right labia minora and some 6-7 red spots to the right near my bikini like. Went to the doctor, he said none of it appears as herpes however took a swab and I'll find out this Thursday.
After the doctors visit, I was feeling irritated from the sex I had the previous night and had what appeared to be ulcers/ white irritated skin at the entry of my vagina equally on both sides. Sunday morning I had a about 10-15 red spots near the entry of my vagina, just outside on my outer labia - disappeared by night however before bed my entry where I had irritation from sex went from white to now 2 red sores equally on either side. No pain when pressed down, no pain when urinating - feels exactly like a friction burn HOWEVER all these red spots/bumps are not normal for me and there was just way too many. Now Monday 9am all red spots/bumps/sores cleared - can herpes OBs come and go within a 24 or 48 hour period???
Doctor said if swab comes back negative, he will allow one more blood test at week 12 and if that comes back negative for IGG, no more testing. I'll post results in the case anyone is going through the same thing as me i.e positive IGM and minor symptoms.
Did two additional swabs in the last week - one for red bumps that were on my labia minora and bikini line and the other swab from my cervix. All negative!
I have my form to re-test for herpes IgG but I'm having second thoughts about re-testing. What if I come back positive and I don't know how to process the information well? Is it worth it? IgM positive at 5.5 weeks but IgG negative. Should I assume I'm negative and move on with my life? Or is that being irresponsible with my sexual health? I'm so scared :(