I'm so sorry you're going through this with a doctor who clearly has such limited and incorrect information.
First, the chances of a 7.68 being a false positive are really very low. The CDC and most experts in the field say that anything over a 3.5 is definitely positive.
The IgG looks for antibodies. It can take up to 4 months to show positive on a test, but some do much sooner than that - the average is about 6 weeks.
Since you were tested in 2017, and were negative for hsv2 then, you can narrow your infection time to between then and now.
90% of people with hsv1 - which you can assume is oral - never get any symptoms. You're absolutely correct that a good chunk of the population has that, and many get it during childhood. Having hsv1 can make your hsv2 less noticeable. If you got hsv2 and didn't have hsv1, you'd have a primary infection (meaning you have no hsv antibodies already) and you'd have been far more likely to have the big, bad outbreaks that you often hear about with herpes.
So transmission - you can transmit it without having outbreaks. There is something called asymptomatic viral shedding, which means the virus is active on your skin without any symptoms. This happens whether or not you have outbreaks.
But don't panic. We have transmission stats for hsv2. You don't mention your sex, or the sex of your partners, so I'm going to give you both. Unfortunately, we don't have studies on same-sex couples, but I'll explain that more in a bit.
Shedding rates: (and you can find all this in the herpes handbook - https://westoverheights.com/herpes/the-updated-herpes-handbook/)
HSV 2 genital 15-30% of days evaluated
HSV 1 genital 3-5% of days evaluated
HSV 1 oral 25% of days evaluated
HSV 2 oral 1% of days evaluated
Ghsv2 transmission, female to male, over the course of a year, assuming sex 2-3 times a week:
Only avoiding sex during an outbreak - 4-5%
Adding condoms OR daily suppression - 2-3%
Adding condoms AND daily suppression - 1-2%
The transmission rates for hsv2, male to female, over the course of a year, assuming sex 2-3 times a week:
Only avoiding sex during an outbreak - 8-10%
Adding condoms OR daily suppression - 4-5%
Adding condoms AND daily suppression - 2-3%
(When I use "female" and "male", I am using them as the study that determined these rates used them. Here, "female" means someone with a vagina, and "male" means someone with a penis. This does not encompass gender identity at all.)
Generally speaking, for same sex partners, women who have sex with women have a lower risk of transmitting any STD, and men who have sex with men have a higher risk, simply because of the activity. There's no penetration involved with 2 women (again, using this as 2 people with vaginas).
So what does this mean for you practically speaking?
Medically, not much. For the vast majority of people, herpes doesn't affect your life much. Since you aren't getting outbreaks now, physically, you probably aren't affected at all. You may get outbreaks at some point, or you may not.
You can consider taking suppressive therapy, like Valtrex or acyclovir, to help reduce the chances of transmission (and getting an outbreak), if you are in a relationship with someone who doesn't have it. That's a decision you'll have to make with your partner, or for yourself, if you aren't in a relationship.
I've had herpes for over 15 years. I've dated men who don't have it, and it really isn't a thing. First though, you have to come to terms with it. If you can't accept it, you can't expect your partners to.
Let me know what questions you have that I haven't answered, and read the Herpes Handbook that I linked above. You'll get through this, I promise. It's not nearly as bad as whatever your thinking. :)
Thank you so much definitely reading through everyone’s stories and your answers have given me full insight and yes you’re correct my ex doing this to me shows the lack of consideration that he had for me AT ALL and shows that I trusted the wrong person. I wouldn’t want that to happen to someone else. It just sucks that this is all the case for so many people. And of course the stigma behind it being that it’s just a “skin infection” in reality. I’m hoping a cure will fast forward or at the most a vaccine for those who don’t have it. I will be speaking to my PCP about the therapy suppression. I’ll definitely be back with more questions I’m just trying to cope with this the best I can.
Thank you so much for your understanding and relation.