Let me first address the easiest thing - :How likely is it to pass on hsv2 to a child from accidentally sharing cups food?" Assuming for a second that you have hsv2, this scenario is impossible. You are only infectious from the location of infection, and you are asking about your genitals, so unless you are having inappropriate contact with the child, you won't ever transmit hsv2 to the child.
Okay, so the rest.
First, a lot of this can be addressed by you getting a blood test. Ask your doctor for a type specific IgG blood test. This may not tell you if you got herpes from the encounter in June, as it can take up to 4 months to show positive on a test, but it can tell you if you've had hsv2 prior to that, and it's been a possible cause of your symptoms.
From your name, I'm wondering if you're in Chicago. I might be wrong, and you don't need to confirm or deny. My only reason for saying that is that if you're in the US, and especially in or near a major city, you should be able to get this test done. If your doctor won't do it, there are ways to get it done on your own. Let me know if you need that information. See if your ENT will do this tomorrow. If he/she won't, don't be surprised - they may say they don't deal with STDs.
That said, this could also be an allergic reaction to anything that is coming into contact with your genitals - soap, body wash, laundry detergent, shaving cream, wax if you wax, underwear fabric, toilet paper, wipes - you get the point. Think of everything.
If you are using wipes, stop. Same with any feminine washes, unless you are under doctors orders to do so. The vagina is like a self-cleaning oven. It has good and bad bacteria that keep each other in check, and keeps everything in balance, and clean. The only thing you really need to do is take a wet wash cloth gently to the exterior parts and gently wipe them clean.
Try changing toilet papers, and laundry detergent, though try one at a time, because if something helps, you won't know which it is. If you use scented anything - toilet paper, laundry detergent, body wash - change that first. If you are using ultra strong toilet paper, change to something ultra soft, for example. Change to a "free" laundry detergent, like Tide Free or All Free.
It could also be eczema, but a biopsy should determine that. Tingling could occur with either of these. Tingling is not exclusive to herpes.
If you already have hsv1, you can't get that again in another location. You can rule out hsv1 genitally since you have an established oral hsv1 infection.
I don't know what's on the roof of your mouth. It could definitely be an allergic reaction. Oral hsv2 is possible, but it's very rare, and I'd be surprised if this is what it is since it healed so quickly.
Do you still talk to the ex? Can you ask him to test? If he's negative, and ask him to send you the results, then you can put herpes fears to rest.
One thing I want to address is that if you have herpes - really of either type in any location - you are not a walking bio-hazard. You are only infectious from the site you have it - either orally or genitally. You'd only be able to transmit it via kissing, oral sex, or direct genital to genital contact. Sharing food is fine, so long as you use different utensils, which is always a good idea as colds and flus are so easily spread this way.
I don't know enough about chronic-active EBV to know if that's causing these symptoms, but that sounds like a really serious disease. Have you been diagnosed with that specifically, or are you testing positive for antibodies? If you have CAEBV, you must have an infectious disease doc or immunologist or other specialist that would want to know about this, and would probably rush to get you a blood test.
Do you take Valtrex daily or just when you get an outbreak? If you take it daily, it might delay antibody development a bit. Don't stop taking that, though, if you have CAEBV, unless your doctor tells you to.