It would be very unusual that you have HPV if you and your husband were both virgins when you got together. It is more probable that you had a Pap smear that was not read properly by either the computer or the pathologist. I would suggest a repeat Pap smear in 6 months rather than an invasive colposcopy. If you need to have an HPV test, I would not have the Digene or the Cervista test that most use in the US. I would have a PCR HPV test that is 100% reliable and can tell you (I doubt you have it) the exact strain of HPV.
HPV is very common, there are almost 200 strains. 40 of these are gential strains, high risk strains can cause cell changes, like what was found on your pap. This is called dyplasia and they range from mild to severe. In rare cases these changes can lead to more serious health issues but with prevention, yearly paps and various procedures this can be prevented. Low risk strains can cause warts. Most sexually active adults will have HPV at some point in their lifetime and many never show symptoms. In some cases people can have HPV dormant in their system and then because of something like low immune system issues or stress they will develope symptoms. People can also have flare ups but it is usally normal for people to pass symptoms within 24 months and never have issues again. Once you have a strain you have it for life but like I said that doesn't mean it will be a concern. You and your husband share the same strain (s) and you can't bounce it back and forth.
Yes HPV is an STI (sexually transmitted infection). There is very little that suggests transmission can be made via anything other than skin to skin gential contact. HPV is not spread via fluids and can't really be found to be spread by objects other than something in direct contact with one gential to the others. Such as touching yourself then a partner. There is some risk in oral transmission via deep french kissing but again this is not typical. There is no way to know who got HPV and when or from who. There have been some cases of virgins getting it and not knowing it for years. I know my parents were virgins and I don't think they ever cheated and my mom had HPV 20+ years ago, had a procedure and never had another issue with it. With warts it is more typical they are from a new infection and often appear 3 to 6 monts post transmission but again there are exceptions.