Human Papillomavirus (HPV) Community
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Avatar universal

just diagnosed... what should I do?

I was just told that I had my first abnormal pap... my reading of HPV/LSIL/CIN 1 confirmed that I know when and who gave this to me.  He is uncircumcised and gave me a bacterial infection which is why I went in.  I am so angry right now... with myself and my instinct that I should not have had sex with this man, but I did anyway.  I had just gotten out of a nasty divorce and was extremely lonely and stupid.  I haven't spoken to him in quite a while, but I just want to tell him and be angry with him.  I know it is no use though.  What is worse is I have now infected a guy friend of mine that I started seeing about 6 months ago and I don't know what to do about that either.  I don't think he will be there for me and I know he will be angry and never speak to me again... How and should I tell him?  I was just getting my life on track and now...?  

I was told it may go away on its own.  Is this real common?  I have my biopsy scheduled for next Wednesday.  Will it hurt?  What is the percent likelihood that it will lead to cervical cancer eventually?  Is there any possibility that any other cancers will be more likely because of this?  Anal, ovarian, uterus, abdominal and I am sure there are tons of others I am not thinking of?

Also, I've taken birth control since I was 16, so almost 12 years now.  I did have an IUD when I was married for about 3 years, so I guess that takes it down to 9 years.  I understand this can put me at even higher risk for cervical cancer with HPV, so should I get off of it?  I dislike it anyway....

I've been reading on supplements... folic acid, shark cartilage, minerals and vitamins C and E... do you have any suggestions?  I have been taking Juice Plus, a food based multi, magnesium/cal, and a couple of other things for quite a while, eat an almost 100% organic diet (I do eat meat, but am trying to cut back on red meat and other highly fatty meats), exercise 3-5 days/week and don't smoke.  I'm 150, 5'6", 27 and generally do not get sick.  Is there anything else I can do?  I'll eat an all raw diet if that will work!

I do drink alcohol... sometimes too much when I'm all stressed.  Should I quit all together?  Normally I probably have 6-12 drinks a week, but sometimes more.  Mostly wine.  I started having less since I found out.  

Thanks for the outlet.
34 Responses
Avatar universal
Personally, if I were infected with high risk HPV I wouldn't be all that concerned.  As long as you're keeping up with your exams, and taking relatively good care of yourself, you have nothing to worry about.  Rarely does HPV lead to life threatening circumstances.  Seeing as there is no test for HPV for men, the person who gave this to you had absolutely no way of knowing he had it.  Anger towards him for high risk is pointless.  And as far as infecting someone else goes, high risk HPV will probably cause him absolutely no problems.  Most people have high risk HPV, actually.

Your immune system will eventually suppress the virus, making it virtually impossible to transmit.  Usually this is occurs within 6-24 months (unfortunately low risk HPV clears more readily than high risk HPV).  After a year 70% of women will no longer have HPV, after two years 90% of women will have beaten the virus.  Only 10% of people have prolonged trouble with it, the odds are in your favor considering that you're young and healthy.  As far as the drinking goes, I'd cut down a bit just for other reasons, 12+ drinks a week is a tad excessive and not good for other systems of your body.

I would read the information provided by doctors through the expert forums, info from the American Social Health Association (http://www.ashastd.org/hpv/hpv_overview.cfm), and information from the CDC (http://www.cdc.gov/STD/HPV/).  These are some of the most credible sources available online.  Be weary of other sites claiming to give you accurate information, there is a lot of misinformation and moral propaganda on the web about HPV.  Please ignore sites such as Yahoo Answers, and HPVforum when it comes to this.  While there is some accurate information there, the inaccuracies outweigh the truth.
Avatar universal
I can personally relate to ur feelings dear....i got high risk HPV after being celibate 10 years from uncircumsized male.....but i will take fault in my part for b-lieving what he told me and not using condoms.Empathy has given u some great advice here....and u need to read and educate urself on the real facts....keep up on those paps and follow what ur doc advises.
Avatar universal
I did the same thing... believed him about being clean.  Definitely my fault;(
Avatar universal
many men are amazingly ignorant to high risk HPV..they think it 2 b a womans problem due to gardisil commercials and r more hip 2 the genital wart strain due to its obvious signs.They don't think and disbelieve the concept of high risk hpv cuz no test for them.My x had std testing...but i think lied about no sex for 3 years..plus he was a heavy smoker and that coulda suppressed his virus.I know he didn't give it to me intentionally but his reaction when told was yelling screaming and it wasn't me!It was injury upon insult to me but i have healed up over it to a big degree..got a ways 2 go...and u do 2..u will find a lot of good info here and support as I have!
Avatar universal
I've thought this way about it too.  There's so many emotions tied up with romantic relationships, that sometimes anger and blame gets misplaced.  I'm not happy at all about having an STD, but I consider it more an unfortunate circumstance than his fault.  I chose to have sex with him (protected, even), and sex comes with an array of emotional and physical repercussions despite whatever precautions you take.  It is our job as sexually responsible adults to accept these repercussions and not misplace blame.  If someone intentionally infected someone with HPV (and I mean having sex with someone while knowing they were for sure still infectious, if someone thought they were clear 6+ months later and accidentally infected someone, this is more forgivable to me- particularly considering there would probably be no way to prove if it was even the same infection), then this is a different scenario.  Unfortunately there just isn't a test for men.  It's something we have to accept.  Ultimately, we are the only ones who are responsible for our own sexual health, no one else.

Sex involves risk, and if someone doesn't think they can handle the risk and aftermath, they shouldn't be having sex.
Avatar universal
I work in substance abuse field...and we do health education.when i talk to men about HPV they have no knowledge...are sexually active with many partners and many not using condoms.They consider HPV a womens issue and seem not to want to know about HPV.I talk with many men of all ages and professions and many men in their 40's and 50's not using protection.Getting high risk HPV is not intentional on anyones part and in this day and age when u make the decision to have sex with someone it is a risk!And a choice!Our adolescent counselors who work with the teens have found high rates of chalymidia and HPV with the teen girls..again when they try to educate the males.....duh!The last newsletter from ASHA noted 1 out of 3 teenage girls has HPV!that is alarming but again i know prevalent in today's culture!And as a last note.....i was very kind and non-blaming when i told my x about the HPV....i said non-intentional on his part.....i knew this...initial apology then yelling screaming got cussed out and phone slammed down.Very immature response i know....but much food for thought regarding my health and the need to safeguard it.At one time i trusted this man with my life....and foolishly so.will never happen again!having xperience like this colors ur perception about things.......and Muscarat u r so fortunate as u say to have a man whose never lied to u and who u trust implicitly so u really have no perception as to how this would b if u were in someone elses shoes.
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