Wow, that's exactly what I'm dealing with. After multiple horrible life events consecutively for the past 3 years, my bf of 18 years had no sympathy or care help for my Sep 9 hysterectomy. He won't talk about our problems but when he has, it's very similar to what you are getting. He says after 3 years dealing w my hell, he just can't handle it. I've lost everything - an amazing career, losing my best dog soon (my soulmate), scary medical issues, all making me slowly losing my mind. After hysterectomy, he'd literally watch me repeatedly do things I shouldn't because he's too lazy. It delayed my healing from surgery, and at about 3 weeks post-surgery, I got yelled at not to do those things by my doc. Even then, he let me hurt myself. At some point I told him let's set aside the mental/emotional needs I have, but that to watch me hurt myself looks like he doesn't even care about me as a human. We talked, sorted out some crap, came up with easy, workable solutions that we agreed each of us would do. Madehim much more pleasant in general but he's not doing any of the emotional support or even "couples time/date night" - HIS idea. I suggest things, and he doesn't like my options or just won't do anything. Asked directly after an ultimatum, he says he still loves me but is stressed and notsure how to handle things. This was before we agreed on ways to help each other.
Hey, at least you have sex!!! I'm not cleared yet from surgery to do so, but we've stopped for the majority of the hellish 3 years. I've told him repeatedly that if he won't offer me any emotional closeness or even physical contact, I will not have sex with him. Yet he loooves me and we can work it out.
I hope your situation improves or maybe my crap can help.
Just a question here. Are any of you on HRT? Do you still have your ovaries?
I had a full hysterectomy both ovaries being removed (42). My gyno put me on HRT patch the day after surgery and to be quiet honest, I am not having ANY issues.
My libido if great, I no longer have night sweats, I am not moody (however I never have been).
This is just a thought..Not everyone needs the HRT.