JOURNALS...

[LIZZIE LOU]

JOURNALS...gggggggrrrrrrr...get rid of them ! ! !

this forum ran smoothly without them for maaaaaaaaaaaaaaany years.  they are NOT necessary and are abused on a regular basis.  

(just my opinion)

[stubby226]

I agree about enjoying the notes and finding the journals a good way to not only get to know someone but even to know someone is ok if yu have not heard from them in awhile.

[April2]

I've never had any problems with any journals, mine or posting on someone else's. I've actually seen more fighting just in the regular posting on different forums. It's actually easier and quicker to delete comments or even the whole journal if people are starting to fight or get nasty.
I've been on this site for over a year and a half and before they started the journals I saw a lot of fighting on regular threads. So, I guess if people want to fight, they'll find a way. There was one particular person that I can think of who was only getting on threads to start fights and name calling, etc. Every time MH would delete the comments, she'd pop back up the next day under a different username. It was getting old. Thankfully, she hasn't been back since then but, boy, was it ever unpleasant for awhile there.

LIzzieLou, can I ask what your dislike is of the journals? Did something happen on one of yours or something?
I have to say I've really enjoyed the journals! It's been a great way to get to know people better and a great way to share a little of ourselves.

I like the notes, too. It always gives me a smile to log on and see that someone has sent me a "hug" or "prayer" note or whatever. I find them very encouraging and nice.

I hope MH keeps these. I love this site!

[Med Help]

Thanks for sharing your opinion on journals. We will not be removing them as many members do find them useful for sharing information or writing down their thoughts. If you do not wish to write or read journals, you have that option. If someone writes something abusive, please report the journal and it will be reviewed by our moderators.

Thanks,
MedHelp

[laurel453]

i agree with what you have said, iladvocat ..

i think journals are a really good feature, i've read quite useful information on them  and even good articles and anyway, if any of us  doesn't like them, just don't read them and mind our own bussiness . Really very easy to do and much  better than censor them, imo ...

[MJIthewriter]

LIZZIE LOU, may you please explain to me what you mean by unbelieveable?

I think it's rather simple:  People are free to express their feelings and viewpoints as long as it isn't a personal attack againt any members on the website. It's alright to vent anger and frustration.

People can choose to reply or not. If it offends them, then they don't have to reply. It only becomes "drama" if someone posts an attack against the writer of the journal to get them angry. There's the old saying, "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it."

[LIZZIE LOU]

UNBELIEVABLE!!!!!

[MJIthewriter]

It's alright to discuss one's feelings. Yes during those times of depression it is hard to se anything good, but at the same time, I learned this the hard way, if it is something that happned on the website that upset me, I'm better off keeping my mouth shut and not discuss it out in the open.

Yes I vented about things that bothered me on the website, but did it really help me?  No it didn't one bit. It only got people more angry.  Knowing this now, I can avoid posting things that may possibly offend other people on the website. That said, I still am free to discuss other things. If I feel down in the dumps and feel like nothing is going right at the moment, I can express that. If someone posts a disgreeable comment on the journal or on my profile, then it's their problem.  But rather than retaliate, it's better to report that comment to the admins or ignore it.

That's a tough lesson for me to learn when it comes to very personal attacks.  It's better to ignore than to make any mention, even in pm that it hurt unless I can speak with the person directly though pm and be sure they are open to understanding. If they aren't then I have to ignore them or block them until they are ready to stop making attacks.

One thing I'm wanting to do which I believe is a better option to retaliating or blocking is to see if I can get the person to change the subject and talk about something else.  At least that's a plan I hope to do in the future. If they can't change the subject then it's time to ignore the person for a while.

[ILADVOCATE]

I do think there can be a misuse of journal entries but just like any feature here. That doesn't mean there's something wrong with the feature. If someone is using it as a blog to vent their frustrations that's not abuse it just means it may not interest other people but it makes the person feel better in writing it. If the person is genuinely upset and describing why, people can be supportive. I found with mine though that length is everything. The ones that went on for several paragraphs didn't get comments so perhaps they didn't interest people but I noticed that people signed up to the site just to find out about new treatments for tardive dyskinesia so that showed a positive effect. However, that brings to mind one important concern. Everything you post is visible to the public unless you set your journal to "private" (which can be a good idea at times) so if someone is speaking about a troubled relationship its important as people can offer coping solutions but don't be too specific about the person, even though they are off site as they can read it. And if you have a concern with a particular site user even if you don't name them don't mention them in description. They will know and be hurt or offended. And most importantly, if someone has concerns about Medhelp in general, post them in the suggestion forum as we are doing here. And as for comments as long as they are not hurtful or antagonistic then I don't see any concern. Everyone has their own style. Some people offer emotional support. I usually tend to offer practical advice. Both are warranted. The main ground rule to me is if its a concern about a specific user pm them don't post it or if its a concern about Medhelp in general post it in the suggestions forum. Otherwise, as long as the language is appropriate and other basic rules are followed, then its not really a big deal and if doesn't interest other people that's a good skill to learn what to put in the next one that might engage people. With every new feature there comes a chance for abuse but that's a given. I see no reason why the journals entries shouldn't stay as a feature but as always if there are ones that are offensive to you flag or report them judiciously.

[lonewolf07]

Some of us are often alone and in emotional or other types of pain and for me at least, the choice becomes writing a journal or doing something stupid and hurting myself.  These journals are not meant to elicit sympathy or pity; they are meant to be an outlet.  I am aware that we can choose to make our journals public, for friends only or private.  Unfortunately, there have been a number of times when I thought I was writing for myself only to find out that I was writing for everybody.  There are people here that I don't want to see my pain and some that I do.

As a person who has suffered from severe depression and anxiety since childhood and been in therapy for it, I have found that writing and drawing often help.  I don't write to get attention.  I don't write to have people say "wonderful things" about me.  Also, with respect to the comment about ignoring the good comments - well, depressed people tend to do that when they are suffering through a severe depressive episode.  Similarly, anxious people often say they are going to commit suicide when what they really want is to kill the pain of anxiety.  When someone has walked the path of the depressed and the anxious I'll listen.

I don't pretend to know about other forums and wouldn't presume to even say I understood what it feels like to be autistic, have HIV or other problems.  Furthermore, I don't speak for other depressed and anxious people, I speak only for myself.

Maybe there should be a section in "settings" that allows both the writer of the journal and a potential reader to agree to read the journal and have the option to change his/her mind if he/she wants to.

There is a trend towards phrases like "attention seeker"; "drama queen", "gets real old"; "move on" etc.  Well, when someone gets to the point of hurting themselves, giving in to a craving, being so isolated it becomes unbearable I wonder how a comment like "that's getting real old" or "what a drama queen" will effect the person reaching out for help.

I know I wont be writing any more journals and will be very, very careful who I talk to after this.  If I have the strength maybe the saying, "Let he/she who is without sin among us cast the first stone."

[LIZZIE LOU]

"journals arent the problem...it's how they are used"

my point exactly ! ! !

[dominosarah]

I agree......some of these people have journal entries all the time and it's the same old stuff.  Gets real old.

[MJIthewriter]

I disagree. Journals aren't the problem. It's how they are used. Used right and they can be a helpful resource. (please check my earlier journals about autism and my dad's (MJthewriterdad) journals).  But true, some journals and notes are better off as personal messages, espcially some of the comments.

That said I have no problem with people venting but I do wish they would listen to the advice and support they receive, rather than disregard it and focus on the less supportive remarks. I see a lot of frustration, and I wish that people can take what steps need to be done to reduce some of that frustration.

[peekawho]

If there is something inappropriate in a journal, you should report it right away, but I agree--they skirt the lines sometimes.  

I sort of feel the same way about the "Notes".  They are used as weapons by some people.