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Precautions when getting sexual with a person with Glandular Fever

HI there, I like a person I've recently met and we connected well. We want to get sexual  but heard that she has glandular fever. I did a bit of research on Glandular fever and figured out that it's a bit hard to handle if infected eventhough not life threatening.
A little background about myself.
I'm 28 , male, healthy , energetic , always active, didn't have any sexual relations with anyone since a lot of years. I only have sex when in relationship and nothing outside that. So this is a relationship after many years(more than 10 years). I've been a careful person in terms of sexual relationships. So I don't want to risk getting infected and suffer with it. My query is to know what activities could be deemed safe to do as part of us getting sexual that would not risk me getting infected. I have a few questions below and would love for you to add some more things I don't know.

1) I've read kissing is a no since there would be an exchange of saliva. Can you please explain me how to kiss safely if possible or any other precautions related to kissing.
2) Since saliva contains the EBV virus, what are the chances of getting infected if she gives me oral and her saliva is all over my penis.
3) If I give her oral or lick her vagina , what are the chance of me getting infected by the virus since i might ingest her vaginal fluids.
4) Also what are the chances of contracting the virus if I have unprotected sex with her since we are planning to have unprotected sex due to the trust in our relationship
5) How safe is unprotected anal sex in this case and how safe is it in normal situations when a person has no confirmed STD's.

I've read that since the virus lives in the body till the end, I do not want to risk infecting the next person i come contact with who could be a future wife and kids.
Also , I do not want to risk getting too sick to even get along with daily life and hence willing to walk out of this relationship if the odd's are against it. A few week of emotional pain is better than months or years of physical pain and suffering.

2 Responses
1415174 tn?1453243103
Hello, and welcome to the infectious Disease Forum. When you say Glandular Fever you are talking about Infectious Mononucleosus and or Ebstein Barr virus?  Most adults have been exposed to this virus. You both should get tested to see what your antibody status is. If you have already been exposed in the past it won't matter if she has it. If she has active mono I would wait about a month or two until she has gone through the infectious stage. Does she have symptoms? If she does she probably wouldn't feel well enough to do anything anyway. But if she had it in the past like most people then  getting her status and making sure you both are in the chronic stage would be good. About 95% of  all adults  have been exposed to some form  of Herpes type 1 and or Epstein Barr virus by age 40. So more or less by around 30 most of us have one or the other. Usually, you get these as a child or teenager. So if you are not active there are no worries. Since you are concerned get a blood test for EBV antibodies and for Herpes 1 and 2 . Herpes 1 is really no big deal. I mean if having a cold sore kills the relationship that is up to you. Getting genital herpes type 1 hurts for 1 time maybe twice and it usually doesn't come back . Type 2 Herpes is another matter. I would think hard about that one. We can discuss again if you need more information if you want to get tested and have questions after that. Often times one partner will not have any symptoms and still can be positive. or you can have no symptoms for years even 20 years and then get symptoms. It happens trust me. The virus lives in the nerves. So you could have antibodies to it or Herpes and not know.
Thank you Doctor for your patience in answering my query. I really appreciate and thank you for your quick response.

I do still have a few more queries regarding this.
Before that I'd like you to please consider this assumption and provide your answers accordingly. Please assume I'm not infected with the EB-virus and don't have any antibodies. Also I'm a layman in terms of medical knowledge.

1) Please explain the relationship between EBV and Mononucleosus.
2) My partner apparently suffered from the symptoms and will be getting a blood test done to see if she is contagious
3) Taking the assumptions into consideration , what are the chances of me getting the virus if she is contagious or become non-contagious if get sexual with each,  which might include mostly unprotected sexual activities.
4) If I get infected, how long will it take for the symptoms to appear and how long will they stay and when will the symptoms stop.
5) Also how severe can the symptoms get
6) I've had jaundice when I was 15 years old and now i'm 28. Would there be chances of getting it again if I get infected.
7) In layman terms how long will the symptoms last and I become non-contagious again.
8) What is the test that I should get done to check the antibody identification and the EBV thing.

Rick Mayor
1415174 tn?1453243103
1. The virus EBV causes the disease mononucleosis.  The CDC states that some other viruses can cause mono but I don't know what these are.
2. Glad your partner is going to get tested. That helps. It would be helpful if you got tested too.
3. Yes you an apparently get mono and/or EBV from sexual activity:
through bodily fluids, especially saliva. However, these viruses can also spread through blood and semen during sexual contact, blood transfusions, and organ transplantations.. Whether you can get it from her vaginal secretions I don't know. So you may want to visit a doctor on this. If there is any blood exchange it is possible then for example if tissue gets torn by accident or small capillaries .  But that is why if you are already immune you may be okay. You can also get it from sharing Utensils, drinking after them etc. It is easily transmitted by saliva. So I don't go off of chances. It is hard to say. But if you kiss you will probably get it if you never had it before or never exposed to the virus at all.  Sexual transmission I don't know what the odds are. I would ask an infectious disease doctor. I am not a doctor. I am a microbiologist. I can only give some advice.
4. symptoms of infectious mononucleosis usually appear four to six weeks after you get infected
     If you get mono you can have: more white blood cells (lymphocytes) than normal
    2. unusual looking white blood cells (atypical lymphocytes)
    3. fewer than normal neutrophils or platelets
    4. abnormal liver function. If the liver function tests get too high you could get jaundiced. But just because you had it before doesn't mean you would
        get it again due to past history of having it.
5. The symptoms can be pretty severe for a bout a month. Very sore throat, and lymph nodes swell under the neck, can get swollen spleen, and also extreme fatigue. Some people can have complications.
6.I mentioned about jaundice above.
7. Symptoms last about a month to month and a half.
8. EBV antibodies. These are EBV Antibodies EBV Viral Capsid Antigen Antibody (VCA) IgM, IgG Ab EBV Nuclear Antigen Antibody EBNA-IgG Ab EBV Ab to Early Antigen D, EA-D IgG Ab
Don't just get the mono spot test it is not accurate.
Hope this explains things.
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