Does your partner know about this forum?

[sammy73]

I guess this is more for those still with the partner who cheated on them, but maybe also those who have now found someone new:   Does your partner know you post about your personal relationship on this forum?  Do they read what you've written?  What do they think about it?

When I first started posting here my wife found out about it - I didn't tell her, but neither did I make any effort to hide it.  She was quite upset.  She really wasn't happy that personal details that concerned here were being put somewhere that anyone could read them.  She was also upset about some of the responses, the assumptions and guesses that other people made about here.

My thinking was that no-one searching the 'net for her or me would ever have found this site - although if someone who knew us well happened across it they might be able to identify us, but the chances were extremely small.  Still, I think just knowing it is out there upset her, and knowing that some people had made some unpleasant judgements and some inaccurate but not nice speculation about her.

So, I stopped for a short while.  But I found posting here to be very helpful for me, so I created a new username and have been posting here on and off ever since.

[lor662]

My husband knows im on it,,he just dont know i have pictures up,,

[Judy246]

If my Andrew knew the amount of time I spend on this forum, he would probably take away my new laptop (lol), but I have absolutely nothing to hide, so if he wants to take a look, so be it. I wouldn't be able to hide anyting anyway, because it's obvious by my name "Judy"....it's me.

[megochick101]

My husband knows I'm on here, but he doesn't read anything about it. He just thinks i'm weird because i like online forums, i don't really know if he has realized I am usually on it about relationships, but i don't try and hide it so if he wants to see more, he can. He just tends to ignore it lol

[lovemykids465]

Wow let me rephrase that. He did not get a kick out of cheating on me! He got a kick out of reading the posts by cheating.

[lovemykids465]

My husband knows and reads it sometimes. He thinks it has been great for me and both of us. In the beginning he was hurt by some of the comments but said it opened his eyes a bit. He got a kick out of cheating! We laughed most of the night. Said good thing we were on the compt be/c he said I was taking my anger out on cheater that I had for his co- worker. True!

[Judy246]

My answer is no. My fiance is so wrapped up in his world (He is a supervisor with Motorola call center 24/7 emergency center) that this forum is my own private sharing time. I love it. I've become addicted to it (lol), but I love that we can all talk about our thoughts, pains and experience the way we can't with other people. It's as if our very soul is communicating with another soul who has the same problem.

If he would like to take a look and share that's ok, because I have nothing to hide...or maybe my feelings for my ex (jerk) and I wouldn't want him to see that, but overall, it's a great outlet to share with others in the same situation.

[mami1323]

Funny that you mention this. My fiance knows I come on this site and he knows I give advice but he doesn't know I talk about our issues or what he's done. He would be royally pissed to know I post about him. Plus hurt by the comments people made about him. He always felt our problems should remain between us. I guess he would be embarrassed and my biggest fear is him finding out about it. I wonder if I'm being deceptive now.