It seems that mediation like mami stated is the same as here in Aus.I would definitely take advice on what to do.
The cheek of you husband refusing to go to counselling with you! but get a letter sent to turn up to mediation without a please or thank you.
Who has sent the letter ?? does it come from the Court system ? if you don't turn up it could be used against you ....so you must get advice.
Here we go again do as I say....... not as I do.
From my experience when my friend was contemplating a divorce with her husband, he offered mediation as a simple way to end the marriage. However, in mediation they were given certain options that could infact save their marriage. One of the options was to complete 90 days of marital counseling, they were to live separately during that time but continue to do counseling, and try to be amicable about visitation pertaining to their son. During this process they actually reconnected and rebuilt their relationship. Her husband had cheated on her with a co-worker so it was difficult but they are working on it. But counseling was definitely enforced. Some states actually require it prior to allowing the divorce. I would talk to an attorney about what your options really are.