Thank you for sharing, that must've been hard to write. I am truly sorry for the loss of your son. The death must have been absolutely devastating. I wish your other son would understand why you left. Life is short for him to hold on to such anger and resentment. Especially when you were the victim in all of this. I'm glad you have your daugther though and a wonderful husband. You have been through a lot and so young. I wish you all the best. Your ex husband has to be sick. In order to go after all of those women, family and friends the like, well it just shows that he has a sex problem. Maybe an addiction. But who cares, he's not your problem anymore.
Thanx, for Your Sentiment and Yes, It Was VERY Hard for Me to Share This.
My Son who died - it's STILL Devasting - 2 1/2 Years later. I suppose it ALWAYS will be. He was my Baby Son. There was a Time when He was Beautiful and Charming - He Charmed Us ALL & We ALL Loved Him SO MUCH!! He was EveryOne's Baby. He was also addicted to Drugs and Alcohol and it was His Addiction that took Him Away and My Heart Will ALWAYS Be Heavy that He's GONE!! His Unhappiness was Never Resolved & He died Still carrying resentment for me. I Love Him and I Miss Him!!
I don't look for my Oldest Son to "come around". It's been 20 years since He left here and He's not a Young Man any more - He's 48 Years Old This Year and apparantly He has a good relationship with His father. I guess I should be glad for Him that He has that. But I still feel the loss and I still feel sorry for myself about this.
I do have my "new" Husband and my Wonderful Daughter and Her 3 Wonderful Daughters so I am GrateFul.
Yes, there's no doubt my ex husband was "sick" & had a "sex problem". I (once again) don't follow form here - I don't buy "sex addction". I think that's an excuse to do what You want, when You want - and once again I say - I believe it ALWAYS comes down to "choice" - bad choice, maybe, but choice none the less.
Thanx for Your Sensitive Words.
Because I've stated my Own Observation of my Own Situation isn't to say that I think it's a bad move for YOU to "forgive". I DON'T THINK THAT!! In fact, I think You should "Forgive". I did it MySelf, for a Very Long Time. I do think You should give it Your Best Shot to Forgive & To Go On but I ALSO think You are the "injured" party here and no matter how Hard it might be for Him, it is His "job" to Endure "whatever comes" because it's what He chose to do that brings You Both to This Place today. I'm somewhat disturbed by His term that You "attack out of nowhere". - It ABSOLUTELY is NOT out of NOWHERE and He needs to "get" that!!
It did not work out for me to "forgive and forgive again and again" but ABSOLUTELY I hope it's a successful move for You & Brice. Most Certainly if this is what You and Brice want.
I'd like to take this moment to reply to an earlier post in which Brice asked about PTSD:
I too was diagnosed with PTSD and this is some of what I learned: Psycological trauma causes changes in a persons basic biological functioning. As a result of being traumatized chemical changes in the brain actually take place. A person may become hyper-vigilant or "on the lookout" to protect herself - the "fight or flight" instinct that resides in all of us. It is also difficult to have restful sleep when You feel this "need" to be "on the alert". With PTSD chemical changes actually occur in the brain and one has to have medical intervention to get these chemicals back on the "right" track.
I do wish You the Best,
Oh my dear what can I say! you truly are a remarkable human being, it says a lot for the human soul and how much we can bear.I for once cannot express my respect and amazement that you have come out of this as sweet and kind as you are.
And I thought I was strong my Angel.
You ARE Strong & I Admire That In You As Well !! I Value Your Kind Words Here. Thank You Very Much.
I see You've had Tall Mountains to Climb too & in spite of Your Huge Challenges You have emerged as a Strong and Insightful Woman.
You have much to offer here.