Hi, I am taking a large dose of an unapproved drug.
Technically I believe what I am doing in my country does not violate the law, because the drug is very new, and not yet classified, thus not restricted.
I have asked for some safety advice from numerous doctors, because I wish to consider the situation as much as I can.
Every doctor I have approached has been entirely dismissive, rude, accusatory, and have displayed what I can only interpret as contempt as passive aggression towards me.
I don't understand why I am constantly treated like this? They are not being rational, I am asking for an objective opinion, but I am receiving a complete lack of cooperation, rudeness, and no assistance at all.
I truly do not understand the psychology behind this.
I am at the point of just throwing in the towel and giving up on doctors.
I have had bad experiences with doctors in the past with similar issues as well. I used to smoke Marijuana as well from time to time and I was honest about this, but when I had severe backpain, they refused to prescribe me panadeine forte for a few days for it.I have been treated with contempt and told that because I smoke Marijuana a certain psychiatrist was not willing to treat me, but to come back when it makes me psychotic.
I have enough trust issues with doctors as it is, due to very serious legal situation I am involved with. I fear them writing down "incriminating" information about me, and it being used in court.
Also if a doctor considers you are "at risk of harm to yourself", they can disclose your medical information to anyone, including the police. This is extremely subjective. For example taking an unprescribed medicine as I am, could be considered risking harm to myself. This is one reason why I am not willing to see a psychiatrist or psychologist despite having very serious problems.
I am not the only one that has experienced such problems. My niece who has had a horrific life, beyond imagination to be frank, she tried to get psychological help and various appalling things happened. She was trying to open up to the psychologist and all she mentioned (she was around 16) that her mother was smoking Marijuana on one occasion and the psychologist report it immediately to child protection. This triggered child protection to send the police to her home to try and force her into care. She resisted the police, and they were very violent with her. Her mum was hit, in front of her, so hard in the face that she her face was covered in pronounced bruises.
She couldn't stay at her mums and ran away and ended up being violently raped.
She now hates and pathologically distrusts psychologists. The psychologist told her that it was child abuse that she saw her mum smoke marijuana, its ridiculous.
These kids can't trust psychologists, because they report very minor things to child protection, everything they say ends up getting read by Child Protection social workers and ends up having huge, interfering ramifications.
I don't trust doctors or psychologists either. If you have a standard medical condition it is great, but the truth is, the vast majority of persons that are doctors are practice medicine have a very aristocratic perspective on society, and if you have a controversial problem or situation this provokes significant moral and value judgments from doctors.
One time when I self harmed I went to a doctor for help and he yelled at me, and was significantly emotional and condemning towards me.
Anyway, I never see doctors, if I am going to get a disease and start dying, the idea of being around doctors all the time, and being in a hospital situation. I would rather die, I will not allow that to happen. I will never be at their mercy.