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I do not remember details of cheating ... no alcohol involved

I have cheated on my partner, several times, I have zero recollection of the details though, what I think happened I doubt, I have mis memories ... I feel this is out of guilt and I am afraid to face it ... sometimes I think there was more to it but I cannot remember ... was never drinking ... this ranged from 12 years ago to 2 years and in between ... I read some people that have anxiety can't remember which I have ... sleep apnea which I have ... tinnitus which I have .. ocd which i'm not sure if have would never of thought I had but possibly .... anyone else cheat and feel so remorseful after being caught that they black out all details?  sometimes I feel as if there was someone else but don't remember at all so how can it be true but then again why would I remember?  I am doubting myself
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1530171 tn?1448129593
So how DO you know about these several cheating events?
Who made you aware of these and how did that person find out?
If this happened to me, I would DEMAND a full account of all the details.
How do YOU know the fact that this took place for 10 whole years-up to 2 years ago, multiple times and yet have no recollection of any other details?
Did you ever question any STRANGE circumstances?
Where you ever confronted by your partner, or  perhaps people who you cheated with?
What type of meds are you on at present?
I think you have deeper problems to be concerned with than what you're suggesting in your post and feeling remorseful, whether those incidents took place or not!
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I was confronted several months ago and since I confessed then it has gotten foggier and foggier, I trust my memory from several months ago better than now ... my brain has gone into protection mode I think ... I feel like several months ago it was foggy due to it being a decade ago now it is a distant  memory that I feel in my gut is true because I remembered better back then than now
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