I am 51 and menopausal/post menopausal. I'm active and eat healthy but I love my red wine. I was diagnosed as post menopausal a couple of years ago and then I got a couple of small periods. Blood work was done and then I wasn't post menopausal and I'm menopausal. I CANNOT take estrogen so that is out of the question for a couple of different reasons. My life is falling apart as I am on my 3rd relationship which I am loosing fast because of zero libido. I am begging for any help or advise here. I have a type A personality. I research everything and anything, so I'm quite knowledgeable to a point. I was diagnosed and treatmented for bi-polar for approx 10 yrs (30-40 yrs old). The drugs never worked and I was miserable with side effects. It was later found out I had extreme PMS, similar symptoms to bi-polar I'm told. I was put into clinicial menopause when I was approx 41 yrs old. I can't remember what it was, it was just a monthly shot in the butt and I had to take progestreon every other month to induce my period, which I hemoraged terribly. This lasted a year and I can't seem to remember anything good about the whole process. I always remembered that my PMS peaked every 3 mths which was deadly for me and anyone around me, I could kill!. At 43 I started with hot flashes, night sweats, heart palpatations and anxiety which an ambulance came a couple of times, scarry! Once I knew that this was part of the change beyond no return, it made it somewhat easier to deal with. I have also been suffering from chronic pain disorder from some sort of nerve damage in my mouth that started at the same time as all the other ****. Basically, it feels like an absence tooth. When it first started 8 yrs ago I was on disability for 2 yrs and barely functional. This problem is to indepth to discuss. I'm better now and it's managable without drugs but my hormones always seem to determine the pain levels. I have suffered from horrid night sweats for approx 4 years including racing heart. I don't sleep and can't figure out how I function during the day and I don't ever nap. I'm extremely tired but I have energy? THE BIG PROBLEM! My sex drive has been going down hill for approx 10 years and has been at null and void for the last 2 years. I'm in my third long term relationship within these 10 yrs and about to loose it if something doesn't happen soon. I have never blamed my partners for wanting to leave, as I can't expect health men to live selibit. I feel like I'm living in a black whole and just existing. I find my partner of 5+ yrs very attractive and love him dearly. My medical file is 2" thick of "hormonal issues" and when I talk to my doctor, whom I respect, I get no anwsers or help, accept she believes it was the drug that put me into clinic menopause in the first place which has screwed me up. I am going to make an appt with a Naturopath but in the meantime, I went to a Nutrietion House yesterday and told her my problem and she gave me Vitex which has Casteberry in it. She didn't blind an eye! I told her I had researched this to death and this had nothing to do with libido. She said that you had to treat the causing problem, which she said had been my PMS. I don't suffer like I did with the ragging mood swings but I do notice mood changes etc...which I though was from the lack of sleep. I do have a very stressful job and I'm working on doing something about that. Anyways, I just want advise on anything that can at least boost my libido. I don't want to be alone all my life and I surely don't want to loose my partner. I apolize for writing so much.