just had vaginal hysterectomy.....lots of crying

[fresnoborn]

hi i just had a vaginal hysterectomy 10 days ago. i kept my ovaries. i have been depressed lately. i find myself crying for my uterus. i don't know why i feel this way. i had endometreosis interna and an enlarged cyst and since i am 43 years old and done having  babies, doc and i decided to go ahead with the hysterectomy. my question is....am i going through a mini-menepause or what? one minute i am laughing and the next, i am crying. i am moody and angry. why, i don't know. can you advise me on this? thank you

[sunshine_elaine_22]

I had an abdominal, lost my cervex but kept both ovaries.  The crying is normal.  I went through that for months in addition to wishing I had died during surgery and thoughts of suicide.  After months of weekly therapy, I've gotten over the suicidal thoughts.  The loss of libido, loss of sensation in my breasts and loss of sensation in my vagina, the loss of the uterine contractions I had during orgasim prior to the surgery...all are really hard to deal with.  I had a WONDERFUL sex life prior to surgery with MAJOR orgasims and a strong libido!  Now, I have no desire for sex and am not really even sure that I have an orgasim.  When my husband and I are finished having sex, it's like...was that it?  This surgery has ruined my life.  It's great to know that my husband can't feel any difference after my surgery but I guess it isn't important on how I feel.  And I love what you said about the doctor saying you were done with kids and might as well have the hysterectomy!  If any doctor said that to me, I would tell him that if he is done having kids, he should just go ahead and be castrated.  It's the same thing as a hysterectomy, right?  It drives me nuts that doctors think that a hysterectomy is "no big deal".  It's no big deal because it only happens to us women!!  Do you think that if men had a similar problem they would allow themselves to be castrated?  No way!  They would find some alternate way of solving the problem.  There are 600,000 women a year who suffer through this surgery because the medical community makes a ton of money off of it.  They are not looking for any alternative treatments that would make hysterectomies go away.  You better believe that if 600,000 men a year were being castrated, the medical community would be finding out how to prevent/stop those surgeries!  My goal now is to find some way--don't know how yet--to unite women against this surgery and force the medical community to find some other way to treat women with gynological problems.  It's too late for me but I want my daughters and granddaughters to think of hysterectomies as something they did in the "olden days".

[DarlaT]

That is an absolute LIE that the man will not notice the difference after hysterectomy. My doctor lied to me too. Then the first time I had sex with my husband after the hysterectomy I knew immediatley something was WRONG (we had been married for 14 years at the time)! I asked him what was wrong it took him 1 1/2 years to tell me that it did not feel the same since the hysterectomy. I went to a doctor at a teaching hospital and I had to PRY out of her what happened to me. She finally told me it is the biggest contention between her and her male counterpart doctors. The men doctors say leave the cervix for the male satisfaction she says take it for cancer prevention. My perfectly good cervix was removed even though I asked to keep it and my sex life with my husband was ruined because of it. I then went to a Harvard Dr and was told of course he would notice a difference the cervix is part of the vaginal structure and should NEVER be removed for cancer prevention. He said do we cut of legs and arms for cancer prevention. YOUR HUSBAND WILL NOTICE A DIFFERENCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[lindh]

I can sympathize with you.  My wife had a hysterectomy 23 years ago at age 48 and that was the end of our sex life. Upon complaint, the doctor stated "at your age, you don't need to worry about sex anyway".  Although there was no cancer or disease other than fibrous tumors present, he not only took the uterus and cervix but nearly all of her vagina. Let me assure you that at least some men are greatly concerned about this procedure.  We stay married in separate bedrooms.  My advice to anyone contemplating this procedure is to assume that it is likely to result in an end to sexual intercourse.  If that bothers you, then you need to balance the risks of being sex dead to dying from the disease that demands the procedure. Don't bother to ask the surgeon for advice - you're not going to get good information that way.

[TeriF]

I had radiation/chemo back in Mar-May. They fried my ovaries, which at the time I didn't think was a big deal, no more periods, and I was finished having children...but now, OMG! The hot flashes, the crying, I also am lucky enough to have cold flashes as well. Those are worse than hot flashes. I have several docs that I am waiting on to get with each other to give me some kind of treatment plan to fix me. Does anyone have any ideas on what NOT to take, or what is the best to take? I am only 36. I am awake every 1-1 1/2 hours and cry a lot...Any advice would be helpful!!!

[Machelle Seibel, MD]

A. It sounds like you are having a difficult time. Having your uterus out and leaving your ovaries in stops your periods but it usually doesn