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Avatar universal

22 with porn induced erectile dysfunction?

The first two times I tried to have sex I couldn't get an erection at all, one time was sober one drunk. Then the next girl was kind of a 3-night stand over a weekend with the only improvement being getting a half-erection and penetrating momentarily before it was too flaccid to go on.

Now, I've met the woman of my dreams, definite soul-mate and drop dead gorgeous...I ended up telling her about my past failures in intercourse and she joked it would happen with us but I was sure it wouldn't because theres a real connection with this girl, unlike the other two. And she's beautiful too, out of my league even...But sure enough the other night it was time and of course I couldn't get an erection...

I managed to get a decent halfer at first when the clothes started coming off and she grabbed around, but then it just wimped out and went away...

I've looked at internet porn since I was 12, now I'm 22, There have been times where the internet porn addiction got kind of bad, but it always mellowed out to calmer more normal routines, but always frequent. Sometimes I'd masturbate daily, multiple times daily, but then other times I'd go for a few days or so without any porn or masturbation.

Either way this girl is really cool and understanding and we talk about it openly with next to no embarrassment on my part anymore, I was going to see a doctor but then we decided it might be porn induced or psychological, and after that night I've written off all porn and I'm not masturbating again for a while.

My question I guess is was this enough for any of you? What was your porn addiction like in level of seriousness/frequency?

I'm hoping just abstaining from any kind of porn or sexual release for a while and only allowing myself to get off with her will work...If not I'll be crazy bummed...but I guess I'd go to a doctor...I'm just hoping porn has Temporarily (hopefully very temporarily) given me this problem and its on its way out very soon.

Any help or anything at all is appreciated, its kind of hard to talk about this stuff openly with your friends or "the dudes" and my girlfriend isn't knowledgeable or experienced in this...
453 Responses
Avatar universal
are you saying you can get an erection from looking at porn but not when you are with a woman ?

22 is a bit young to have this problem

Is your penis normal size when flaccid ?

how long have you refrained from masturbating for ?
Avatar universal
Yea, when I look at porn and can just keep browsing endless categories and stimulate myself I can get nice erections, but with a beautiful girl with whom I'm in love I can only get a half-erection that then fades away...

I've stopped masturbating for 4 days, since the morning of the incident.
Avatar universal
that is strange - what kind of porn are you interested in ?

I don't know about "porn" , I am more interested in "fetishes"  eg foot fetish


Is your girlfriend similar to the women in the porn you enjoy - could that be the problem ?

I suppose your willy may have got more used to the porn than the real thing

you could be unconsciously embarrassed by your porn interests and that stops you getting it up

I don't know what to suggest really
Avatar universal
I think its just desensitization, It used to be just naked girls, then that got old then lesbians and so on, so now a beautiful woman naked on my bed I guess doesn't work despite my desires or intentions.
Avatar universal
I would think about "what it is that enters your thoughts when you loose your erection". You could be just lacking confidence.......perhaps fearful of not being able to perform. I would doubt that pornography has caused the problem. What about control.....That's the thing about lots of porn...your in control and there's no pressure... I doubt porn has caused the problem directly. I would go and see your GP. Erectile issues can really mess with your head (no pun intended). Lot's of blokes have a similar problem and he/she maybe able to help. I have had a similar experience in my 20's and i did nothing about it. Now i'm in my 30's and have sought help. Your GP will be able to sort out whether the issue is Psychological or physical. I have used Viagra /Cialis etc and find they often take the pressure off worrying about getting aroused and staying that way..... Problem with using them is if you have no physical reason for needing them and it's more in your head....than you can become dependendant on needing them to have sex and a) their expensive and b) they don't really deal with your confidence issue....

Anyway hope that helps
Avatar universal
you are lucky to have a beautiful woman naked on your bed

no chance of that for me

will she be bothered if you can't get it up long term ?

you could try zinc and maca also l-arginine
Avatar universal
Man it sounds a lot like me. I'm 28 though. I typed a couple paragraphs on here for you but it got erased and dont' feel like typing it out again. If you are still interested in what I had to say I'll type it again. How has the porn-abstinence been going? Is it working?
Avatar universal
Hi mate,,,,,,,,,,,I'm facing the same issue,,,,,,,,,,,I think we shouls stop watching porn,,,,,,,,,,,It's very dangerous,,,,,,,,,Take care mate<<<<<,,,,,,,,, No other way out,,,,,,,May God help us
Avatar universal
Hi mate,,,,,,,,,,,I'm facing the same issue,,,,,,,,,,,I think we should stop watching porn,,,,,,,,,,,It's very dangerous,,,,,,,,,Take care mate<<<<<,,,,,,,,, No other way out,,,,,,,May God help us
176495 tn?1301284012
I went through 5 year self induced 'dry spell' after the end of a relationship.  I wound up viewing a lot of porn and masturbating quite a bit.  Then, I met the woman who ultimately became my 2nd wife and found I had a similar problem.  Finally was able to get an erection and maintain it, then was unable to climax..thanks to her patience and assistance we got through that..and I was in my late 40s then..

Lay off the porn..keep your hand off your johnson..spend time with your girlfriend just "enjoying" being with each other.  after a few days take a nice bath together..soap each other up, relax, etc..give it some time and "it" will come around.  Your body is just used to a different stimulation and the feel of the grip of your hand on your "boy"..relax, and quit worrying about it and give it some time

Jim
Avatar universal
Hi guys,
I've got the exact same problem:
Met a new hot girl, but I can't get it up. I have no problem while using porn. Has anybody made experiences how long it will take to get over that?

(btw: I'm 26 and in good shape, so I'm sure it is the porn why it's not working with a real girl..)
Avatar universal
Here's my theory:  You associate porn with something bad, dirty, forbidden, etc. and that excites you, so you get a hard on.  But this girl is pure, special, everything porn is not, so if you associate her with a hard on, you would be associating her with porn, which you probably don't want to do.  Subconsciously you are protecting her from the former "bad" you and all that "bad" porn excitement.  You need to remind yourself that love is beautiful and that includes the sex that accompanies love.  It can't be bad.  I think most people respond to porn because we are mortal human beings and we really can't prevent our physical reactions to something sexually arousing. It's normal.  Love is special and we respond to that too. I'm sure you're a good person and if you really love this girl, you could never hurt her.  
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