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erection help

First let me tell you a little about myself...I am 38 years old and in good shape, when I say good shape I mean I work out at the gym at least three times a week every week.  I dont do much cardio as I prefer to lift wieghts and have always enjoyed doing that.  I have a sales job that keeps me behind the wheel of my car most of the time and very busy.  I have been to my doctor and he has checked my blood work and I dont have high cholesterol dont have diabites or anything else that would throw up a red flag.  About a year and a half ago I got seperated from my then wife and since have gotten a divorce.  Our relationship was horrible and if not for our two kids we would not have stayed together for ten years.  I had no interest in sex with my x wife and had some problems loosing an erection or comming too quickly when we did have sex.  I didnt worry about it too much because I just thought it was that our relationship was awful and I was not attracted to her.

Since then I have been with two other women and have had some trouble getting and keeping an errection.  I have been with my current girlfriend now for ten months.  She is great, she is sexy and beautiful, loving and caring.  I would say that things have gotten better with her over time and are better than with my last girlfriend.  I seem to sometimes need to keep stimulation or I will loose my erection for example we never switch positions because I will loose it while we switch.  I seem to be fine during oral sex and the real funny thing is some nights I am fine and others not so fine.  I have been to three urologists now (keep looking for an answer) and they cant find anything wrong with me.  I have come to the conclusion it is all in my head but how do I get it out.  The doctors told me to just relax and dont worry about it but it is not that easy.  they all tell me to try the cialis or viagra to get me over the hump and build my confidence and then go off of it.  Well I tried cialis only took a quarter of the pill and I worked like a stallion but I really didnt like having to take it and dont want to continue, I want to be back to my old self, looking forward to sex not avoiding it because I may have a problem.  I want to have my confidence back, I really dont know what to do.  Anybody out there have any suggestions.
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