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3142113 tn?1343383232

My Brother is depressed. how to help?

I have a younger brother who recently started behaving weird and saying irrelevant things which do not concern a normal person. he feel everybody is planning against him to do him some harm. He has stopped going out of home from past one months and says i do not stand any where and people see me as a bag guy. he feels he is worth nothing.  we took him to the doctor and he has stopped talking non sense bt he still fears to move out of home and has totally stopped communicating except with mom dad. how can we me and my parents help him besides the medical help?

5 Responses
Avatar universal

Hello there,

How old is your younger brother ? How old are you ? Do both you and your
brother go to school ?  Why do you think your brother thinks other people see him as a bad guy ? You said your brother recently started behaving weird.  What sorts of weird things does your brother do ? What sort of irrelevant things does your brother say? How long has he been acting weird ? If you answer all my questions, I may be able to offer some suggestions.  Be well.  Eve
3142113 tn?1343383232
He z 22 years. He failed in january 2014 to pass his graduation xams and got detained frm college.  we told him nt to worry n said he can try another year. Then he said he doesnt want to go back to colg n we first tried to convence him to go back bt then said ok leave it. Then he wanted to start earning bt most of the time used to jus stay with friend. We didnt pay much attention until jus couple of months back in june he started saying that he z useless guy who has capability of doing nothing. Once 1 was away fr home, he had told mom that he wil get killed, then said he z a gay, then said people think he z drug addict (whil he z non of these). He began saying that our relative make fun of us behind our back. They think we r fool. They want us to get destroyed. My parents took him to the doctor who said he z depresed and gave medicines. Then he began saying that doctor wants to make him mad, people think he z mad. Etc we tired to tel him it z nothing like dat. N frm the past 2 months he doesnt go out of house except on fridays fr prayer. He has deactivated all his social links and keep his phone off so that nobody calls him. He jus speaks to mom dad n sometime me on phone (i m nt home thz days). He stays inside all day (with mom) and sleeps with dad. Wil he get back to normal again?
Avatar universal

Hello again, Okay. So you are the older sister and he is your younger brother. I think you also mentioned that your brother was in college but that he didn't pass his graduation exams.  I think the fact that he feels useless is his depression talking. How do your parents feel about your brother being
gay ?  Are your parents okay with this and are they supportive ? Sometimes people do not understand that men do not choose to be gay.
They are born that way. I don't have a problem with this, but some people do.  When you are going through a depression, some people experience extreme paranoia.  Paranoia means that they feel other people are plotting against them etc.  It isn't true of course . Also your brother's idea that the doctor wants to make him mad. This is an example of paranoia too. When you are depressed , you have trouble trusting other people. The fact that your brother has deactivated all of his social links and keeps his phone off is significant.  Most people who are going through a depression do not want to talk on the phone even to friends. How do I know this ? I went through a depression more than 10 years ago.  I was suspicious of people phoning. I did not have a way of screening calls back then. I also had a feature called " call waiting " , so if you were talking to someone and you heard a certain click on the phone, you could transfer over to the new caller.  The problem was you didn't know who the new caller was until you started talking to them and the other person you were talking to is left waiting on the other end. I didn't realize how rude it was until somebody put me on call waiting.  I immediately cancelled my call waiting option.
I mention this because of your remark about your brother not answering his phone.  When you are depressed, you don't want to speak to other people. In many ways, it is like seeing through a fog and not being able to think clearly. It is very frustrating. You feel so tired and everything is an effort including talking on the phone and because it is hard to remember things it is very hard to hold a conversation. Your short term memory is very poor. You asked me , will he get back to normal again ?
I hope so for your brother's sake. Depression is a hard thing to get over.
The depression may have started when your brother did not pass his graduation exams. A person going through a depression has very little energy to do anything. Basically, if you are severely depressed, you don't have any appetite. You have trouble sleeping. You have difficulty thinking. You lose things because you can't remember where you put them.
You don't want to go out with your friends because all the time you are
thinking they know something is wrong with me.  Sometimes you think what is the point of getting out of bed today. I am much safer just staying in bed.  This is how a depressed person thinks. Depression is an illness.
Everybody takes a different amount of time to recover and heal. Your brother needs to rest and the best thing you can do for him is to support him. Listen to him when he does want to talk and accept him for the wonderful brother I am sure he is.  Not everyone is college material, some people earn quite a good living just learning a trade like being a plumber, an electrician etc.  Sometimes the stress of trying to please everybody, is just too much for some people. I wish you and your brother peace. Eve

Avatar universal
I think he has seen something weird that let him to think it. The thing he saw may be in his mind. such thing happen frequently in such condition. All you need to do is collapse the fear and incident from his mind. You should let him to generate self defensing power. You never let him to stay alone and always support him. you can learn the self defense from  www.russiancombat.com/watch-online
Avatar universal
Ask for help with some of the stressful things in your life. See if your friends or family will take care of some of the daily hassles, like housework.
Hi there, welcome!  Thanks for sharing your thoughts. Hope you come back and continue to help members here.
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