Encouragement

[finessidol]

I just found out on 12/01/2008 that I had miscarried my first attempt at being a mother.  My husband and I were 3 weeks along and the complications began up waking Monday morning.  I was told by the OBGYN to wait at least 3 months before trting again, however, I have read several posts that indicated pregnancies sooner than that time span.  I know that I want a child, however I am very scared to be let down again.  I have very intense feelings of guilt as if I caused the miscarriage.  I guess I am looking for hope that becoming pregnant again is possible......I appreciate any advice on conceiving again so soon after the miscarriage.

[kc1021]

There are a lot of comments so far but thought I would add mine as well.  I had m/c in Oct at 5 weeks and became pregnant again on Nov 5, with no period in between.  It was sort of a fluke, as I was intending to wait one period.  But I immediately went in to my doctor to have my hcg levels monitored and next week I will go in for an ultrasound at 7 weeks.  So far so good.  I do not think my previous miscarriage will hurt my changes of carrying this pregnancy to term.  Good luck and do what is right for you and your partner.  

[bam1014]

I am very sorry for your loss. I m/c on 8/15 at 8 1/2 weeks.  It is very normal to begin by blaming yourself and wondering what you did wrong.  This website was of great comfort to me:  www.pregnancyloss.info.  There was nothing you could have done to prevent it.  A m/c in the first tri-mester happens so much more often than anybody would like to realize.  Typically the dr's will tell you it is because of a chromosonal abnormality and this is just mother nature's way of telling you things weren't going to be ok.

My dr told me to wait 1 -2 cycles.  We used protection after the m/c until my first AF.  Then we started to TTC again.  I can completly understand the need to want to try right away again.  My DH and I tried for over 2 years and I thought I would never see a BFP.  Now that I know that it is possible is all the encouragement I need to keep TTC.  But your choice is a personal one.  You should recognize the emotional healing as well as the physical.  You will know in your heart when it is right for you.  The ladies on this site are wonderful.  You will be welcome here with open arms.  Feel free to vent whenever you need to.  That is what we are here for, to pick each other up when we are down and to celebrate any good news that comes our way!

[EricaB28]

I am so sorry for your loss. I too lost my baby in Aug. I was 5 weeks max. The dr. did say it was so early that I only needed to wait 1 cycle. It took 14 weeks to get my first AF (I'm still in my first cycle since then). During the waiting time for AF we didn't use protection. And are actively ttc now. I think that if you are emotionally and physically ready to ttc again, then that's your decision. There are certainly quite a few women who get BFP's soon after m/c. These ladies have helped me through a lot as well. Welcome and keep us posted!! We're all here for you :) I'm sending you a big (((((((HUG))))))), it sounds like you could use one :)

[steph9803]

I'm sorry for your loss. I lost my baby back in Aug. My dr. said to wait 2 cycles mainly for emotional reasons. We started ttc after the first AF though. The ladies above are right about this forum. I don't know what I would do with out all of them to lean on. We are all here for you...I wish you lots of luck and baby dust!

[smr08]

I'm very sorry for your loss. I know after a m/c you want to ttc asap.You just want to make sure that you are physically and mentally ready. I was almost 5 months when I lost my son and when I went for my 4wk checkup he said that we can start trying again (I didn't even have my first AF) The difference could be that I did not have a d/c I delivered. Only you will know whats best for you. I wish you all the best.
                                                                      Lori

[mapes10]

I too am sorry for your loss.  The ladies on here have been awesome since my mc back in August.  I interrogated my dr and his partner both about when to conceive again and why.  They both said that their standard answer is 2 cycles, but if they had to give a reason it was for time to heal emotionally.  They both indicated that your body needed at least one cycle to get back to normal, and both were very insistent that you not ttc before you had a normal period again.  I listened, and I am now 11 weeks pregnant.  The whole process of having a mc is stressful, but the worst feeling is loneliness.  No matter how wonderful your DH is, he doesn't understand your connection and feelings.  The ladies here make you feel like you are not alone, and I honestly thank God for bringing these wonderful women into my life.  Take care, and keep us posted.

[ArmyPrincess819]

I'm sorry for your loss. I had a natural m/c back in sept. I too was told to wait 3 cycles. My dr explained to me not only for the physical recovery making sure your uterus gets strong again but there is also the emotional part. When we experience m/c we are very desperate and full of dispair and sometimes when you become pg your feelings are magnified. I know from experience I was told to wait 3 mos I chose not to. There are times I wish I had and others I'm glad I didn't. TTC is a very personal choice only you know what is best for you and what your heart and head can handle. Have you talked to your dh what are his thoughts? I wish you a quick recovery and I hope that you find the answer you are looking for. Best wishes to you and your dh. Take care and check in now and again and let me know how you are doing!

WELCOME TO OUR COMMUNITY!!!

[tarrah87]

sorry for your loss it's def hard and very upsetting. i would wait the 3 months or at least until you have a regular cycle again bc you need time to heal emotionally and physically. i had a m/c aug 07, my first pregnancy, i was devistated, 3 months later first try i got pregnant again and to my surprise twin boys. i lost that pregnancy at 21 wks due to ttts, and an incompatent cervix in march 08, i am now 17 wks 4 days pregnant agian so whatever you do don't give up just make sure you give yourself time to heal. good luck to you and i hope things work out for the best.

[mikaleen]

I'm sorry for your loss.  As for worrying about becoming pregnant again, even though you m/c, you were pregnant, so you know now that it is possible for you to become pregnant.  A m/c won't change that.  It's so very common for women to have early m/c, until the tests were so sensitive many women never even knew they were pregnant.  There are many reasons Dr's tell us to wait a few cycles, and like GMB said it's a decision only you and your partner can make, knowing how you are healing physically, mentally and emotionally.  Good luck!

[GMB08]

well....i bled for 5 days..then i got my first af 33 days later....now this month i was back to normal befor emc at 28 days......i think its a personal issue when deciding when to try again.......

[finessidol]

I am still bleeding but not as heavy as the past two days and the cramping is not near as bad.  Emotionally I am very sad today as compared to being very angry yesterday.  I know that I want a child very badly and I understand that the grieving process is just that......a process.  I was only three weeks along.  

[GMB08]

i am sorry for you loss...we are all here to help. we understand....and we can recognize the pain endured.....my doctor told us to wait 2 normal cycles.....i have had two normal cycles.....the first one wanst normal at all..it was extremely heavy..so oct and this past one have been normal...we did try after the second cycle...but bfn....so we are ttc again...i was 10 weeks....it all depends on you, your body....physically, emotionally....are you still bleeding?