Saying goodbye

[Youngmum20]

How do we cope without getting to say goodbye I'm realy hurthing.. I have recently had a mc on the 21st January it was my 20thbirthday on the 23rd my partner n I have been together for 5 years n have been TTC for about 1 year now as wen i Was 16 we termaned our first pregnance because we were so young n were still at school n dident have jobs... I feel now having a MC that I could have a 3yo baby now witch this is having a big affect on my life now I'm in that much pain harteach... Spend most of my days in bed thinking about trying again I pasted the sack lasnight hurt so bad going back to the dr Thursday n think I still need time to get over this  how long has it takin ppl to C after a MC....????

[Youngmum20]

posted this om wromg status lol

[Youngmum20]

sorry for the late reply as no one got back to me i did it for my self n loved every moment of it =)

[Youngmum20]

sorry for the long reply as i took a brek from the sight every thing basicly felling alot better noe not blaming my self anymore as ti could have been any one it s ppl like u who make ppl like me pull throught im muchly greatfull for ur help n wish we could remailn friends its been 3 weeks since my MC only another 3 weeks to c if my period comes......we have been trying aloot since the inccedent=) mabe we have mabe we havnt..... my scans come back good did not need a dnc but it took my hcg levles a short time to go down as at the 28-01-10 they were at 3 have not had them tested since as my dr sed they would be at 0 thanks heaps for u suport n kindness baby dust *-*-*-*

[MissmyAngel]

Yes I obsessed all throughout my pregnancy as well, to the point of driving DH insane!
Losing the baby really helped us to get closer as well (other than feeling like he doesnt truly understand my pain). I think part of the reason it feels like he doesnt understand is because he has two daughters already from a previous relationship. It makes it really hard. The only place I really have to get my feelings off my chest is on this site.
Though like I said, in many ways we have gotten a lot closer. This time, we are planning this as a couple, its not just a one sided decision. (I am a little guilty of pushing the idea on him the first time around lol) and I'm sure that will make a lot of difference.

[Youngmum20]

Every thing ur saying there most of us can relate to well inknow I can it's so god dam hard I blame everything that dident involve me doing every thing I could to save him I thousgr I was doing every thing right I was so carefull but obesely not

[mothers]

I am so sorry for you all...I too lost my baby, but it was on the 19th Dec 2009...I was about 14 weeks pregnant and miscarried at home...he was alive when he came out...and I keep thinking I could of saved him if I had done this and that! At times I am so angry at the doctors for not paying attention to what I was saying...and then I blame my self I wish I had read more...done more research...something that would of saved my baby boy! Every day is such a battle...nights are even harder I can't sleep because I can't stop thinking about him and how empty I feel. I feel like something just came and snatched him right out of my stomach! and I want him back so badly! No one really understand apart from the mothers who have lost their child...In many ways now I want to have so many children....but it will never bring him back to me...I am also so scared of getting pregnant again in case I go through another loss...I could not live with it. I keep trying to find answers and solutions but every day I realise more and more there are no answers or solutions that could heal the pain and heart ache I am feeling.

I know our babies are in heaven...I keep reminding my self that and also that they are smiling down at us...and I look forward to the day I will see my baby again and finally get to hold him!

[Gailybaby]

Dh and I never talked about ti either but i knew he was hurting alott think he wnated the baby more than i did. now we are tlaking cycles and when to bed and all sorts of things we have never spoken about in 9 years... so in a godo way the m/c helped our relationship i knwo horrible way to think of it. but its helped me and made me more attuntedto that he has feelings to and doesnt show them the way we do.

as fo the stats the doc gave them to me too and i jsut said its god's will and thats it. it gets better i rpomsie and you will be okay... dont cry your heart out.. becuase that little baby is looking down from heaven crying wiht you !

[Youngmum20]

I understand how u feel about ur DH..... Altho it's only been 1 weeks since our loss I'm to belive My DH is over it as a couple we have not spokin about how he feels it's only been about me.... I belive he's hurting but not showing it.... Wen I MC my dr put it to me like this 1in 6 pregnancies end in MC so if I've got 6 friends who r pregnant 1 of them
Will miss carry I've got about 12 friends who r pregnant 1 of them has already MC is there going to be another... My friend who MC only a few days befor me is by best friend I'm feeling for her as she is me..... But I feel as if I can't talk to her about it cos she makes me wanna break down n cry my lil hart out...... Thank u for listing ((((((HUGS)))))) and babydust******~~~~~~******~~~~~~

[MissmyAngel]

To both of you, I'm very sorry to hear about your losses. I lost my first at 12 weeks in July, today would have been my due date. The pain I've been feeling is just starting to go away now. It kept getting worse and worse, until one day I went to the doctor and told him about it. I think I began to heal on that day. Also talking to people on here about my pain has really helped me out a lot. For most of us, there isn't a lot of support in real life, as noone is going through the same thing. Even my husband thinks I should be over it by now. I even have a couple of friends who have been through the same thing before, but they are no help either. One just had a baby and the other got pregnant a month after I lost mine, so they are both too engrossed in their babies.

[Youngmum20]

Thank u and sorry for ur loss atleast there is sum1 eles out there with the same dates at me if u don't mind me asking how far along were u???? I was only 5 weeks

[glenoakgirl]

So sorry sweetheart for your loss.  I too lost my first baby on the 21st Jan.  Your heart will ache for a long time and I truly know how you feel.  The emptiness is awful and I can't stop thinking of my baby either.  God bless you in this awfully sad time.

here if you ever need to talk.
Ria