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Avatar universal

Swift Progression linked to Anxiety

I had my neuro appointment last week to figure out why I had such a fast progression.
I rolled in there with my wheelchair expecting to hear I had ALS or some kind of awful illness.

My neuro examined me as usual and then sat me down.
He ever so gently told me that although he thinks I MS, he is pretty sure that my swift progression is psychosomatic.

My reaction was tears.  I cried because I knew deep down that he was probably right.
He wasn't saying that there is nothing going on, but he was saying that all most of my mobility issues were due to fear and anxiety.  As some of you may recall, this is not the first time I had heard this.He said if it is not MS, he is still concerned with all the "spots" on my brain MRI.

He said I could be one of those people with a rare neurological disorder that they don't normally see.
I think he was just trying to make me feel like I wasn't a nut job!  He's very caring.

He is having me get a second opinion from the MS neuro in the practice.

Upon leaving his office I proceeded to feel really sorry for myself.
After that, I decided to get out of that damn wheelchair and start walking.
None to my surprise I can walk.

Now I am not walking like a "normal" person, but I can get around to living.
A few days later I saw my psychiatrist, who had already spoken to my neuro, and he said I did not have conversion disorder, but I did have much anxiety.  We left off agreeing that I should take daily "walks."

Next week I will see a psychologist and finally start dealing with this anxiety.
It is something I can no longer ignore.

Today I saw a chiropractor who lives on my street wouldn't you know.
He said that he could see why my legs were initially having difficulty.
My spine is all jammed up.  I am also going to get acupuncture to help deal with the anxiety issues.
I see him again on Monday.

Next week I see the other neuro and if he says he doesn't think I have MS, I am going to stop looking.
I am not hoping I have MS as this year has been hell for my family.

I do know for sure that if it is indeed MS, it is not going to kill me anytime soon and I am very capable of functioning normally most days.

I want to thank all of you on the forum who have followed me this last year.
It has been very enlightening.  But the thing I like the most about this forum is that no one will be dis honest.
There have been many times that I have been "called out" on my posts and it has made me be honest with myself and really discover the root of my issues.

So far I have figured out I have had one AWFUL childhood.
I don't think I ever had the guts to admit but there it is.

Maybe I should make a stop at the mental health forum.

Can't hurt!

Keep looking up!

Kerri
22 Responses
Avatar universal
sounds like you are proceeding down a check list and doing very well at it.  We should all have the courage to look "in that mirror" from time to time.
Keep us posted and best of luck as you work thru this.......
620048 tn?1358021835
Just wanted to tell you that was a nice note, but you can't quit this forum. At least I think the door is always open.

Anxiety is so hard to live with and I didn't realize I had it at one time. But I have had a hard with it.  Even two anxiety attacks that were terrifying.

Keep luck with all that and just keep working at it.

hugs, meg
Avatar universal
Hello,

I have been experiencing very mild sensory issues since August in my four extremities. Basically, when I am not sleeping, I feel tingling in my hands and feet. Every day, I feel some combination of tingles. Some days, in my left foot sole. Somedays in my right and left pinky fingers. Somedays in my left thumb and my right full hand, etc. The point is, it is "consistently inconsistent". I took eight months off of neuros and drs as they all said I was fine. I recently started the journey again into a diagnosis.

I say all this because everyone I have seen (neuros, PCP, OBGYN, Psychologist) has suggested anxiety as test results show nothing else. But, I do not consider myself an anxious person. In fact, I consider myself to have a full, fortunate, healthy and happy life. So, how could my body be reacting so negatively to lifestyle I love????

I hope my dr's continue to come to the same realizations that yours do. I hope I can be as smart as you are and write a similar post soon. I want to believe that what I am feeling is a reaction to stress...but I am not there yet.

Good luck to you and thank you for being brave!
Avatar universal
Sarah....
thanks for the vote of confidence.

Meg...
I won't quit the forum.  I'll check in from time to time.
But if they say I don't have MS I don't think it would be right to keep posting.
Feel free to email me whenever you want.

Bostonmom....
Please know that I posted this info as a result of a year of searching.
Like I said in the post, this isn't a new message from a neuro.
The first time I totally rejected the idea not trusting the neuro at all.
But this neuro comes from valid concern.

Now that I am finally honestly looking at my past and present, anxiety is not out of the realm of possibility.  And seeing how I transformed in just a few days, told me that it is a definately factor.

They didn't say it is not MS.  They said that my anxiety made my symptoms much worse than they were.

There are many people here who are labeled anxious when the doctor has nothing else to say or just doesn't want to keep digging.  Those people should keep searching for the answer as they know deep down tht it is not anxiety.

I knew deep down that there was something going on related to my mental health but wouldn't admit it.  So I, subconsciously, created the scenario.

The neuro said I was like a dog with lice and fleas.  Meaning that I had two things going on.  He said I have an underlying valid illness (possibly MS) but I brought the progression of symptoms into my life due to the fear.

Ether way, I am on the right road.
I am not sitting in the despair of being a sick person any longer.
I am now looking at myself as someone who may be sick but will move forward against my mental grain.

Another issue he mentioned was that mental illness is just as valid as a disease.  He said that society just doesnt view it that way and that is one of the reasons I was so against even considering it as a factor.  Either way it is neurological and needs to be dealt with.

Thanks you all for your words of wisdom and I hope you have a great weekend.


987762 tn?1331031553
COMMUNITY LEADER
Kerry,

I am so so PROUD of you right now, you have absolutely no idea how much!! Wow girl, talk about having the courage of a lion, do you even realise how much courage it takes to post your update? I'm being serious, it takes a heck of a lot to face this as it is, but to tell us like you have just gives me goose bumps.

Walk tall and use this 'courage' to your advantage, you have it in spades, sometimes it will hide deep within you, but trust me it is there for you to tap into, remember and reach for it when ever you need it!

HUGS.............JJ

    

Avatar universal
Wow Kerri,
What an amazing post! I think I found this forum to find you and YOUR posts.  You have been so helpful to me with your kindness. Maybe you clicked for me as our symptoms and circumstances have been so similar.

I have not had the neuro tell me I don't have MS, but I tell myself that all the time. Until I am sure it's MS, I'm going to learn how to relax and do some of the same things you've talked about.  Exercise, diet, massage, acupunture, suppliments and meditation (or at least trying to meditate)  That is my game plan for the next 6 months to see if I can't fix this myself as the docs can't seem to give me a treatment that will do anything.  

If they think it's psycosymatic, I wish they would tell me.  I point blank asked them that.   I'm still not sure, but will keep up my appointments until something else comes up that may answer my questions and give me answers that make sense to me.

I would love to stay in touch with you and hear how you are doing with your stress reduction and therapy if you are going to do that on a long term basis.  I do believe that stress can cause SOOO many problems, and just realizing that as you are doing will help so much.  When you realize you can empower yourself to heal just by your mind, that power just keeps getting stronger. I am really pulling for you and your continued journey to a healty body, mind and spirit!  

As a really nice young lady said to me once....Keep looking up!  :)

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