up and down emotions

[truelove47]

Hi Everyone

Does anyone elso get overwhelming saddness, out of the blue, for no reason.?
I have found myself in up and down mood swings.   I am trying to tell myself to snap out of it, but it does not
seem to be working. Sometimes I feel so overwhelmed, but I hide it from the outside world.

I am taking an anti depressent.and going to the neuro in a week and a half.  . Maybe he will prescribe a new one

I dislike this feeling  I kow you guys understand                                             Linda

[truelove47]

Everyone

Thanks for the support...........I know now that i am not alone with these ups and downs

Thanks a lot to everyone                                                        Linda

[HVAC]

Linda

Thanks for bringing this up. I have suffered from depression as a disease my whole life. I have gone as far down as you can go many times. I had it under control with medical help until the MS started two years ago. Lately is been really bad. I am good at covering it. I smile and look o.k.

People say to me "What are you Depressed About?" This is really odd because I am not sad or depressed about anything. I usually see my life as really good and I am depressed and that freaks me more because the feeling does not fit the situation.

I have this curious thing when am depressed I can't remember what it feels like not to be depressed and when I am not depressed I can't feel understand how I felt so low. I feel like I have depressed forever or never have been depressed.

Depression is also a disease that for some reason does not want to be helped. I know when I don't want help and think I can manage I need to call someone right away.

I see depression for me as the law of inertia "A body at rest stays at rest, a body in motion stays in motion" That is why I always am doing something.

I make simple achievable goals when I am in my dark place.

I do not have good support for MS but I do have a good Psychiatrist who allows me to call him whenever I need to. I only call him on the phone when I am hanging by my fingernails but at those times I check in everyday until the wave passes. Just knowing one person really gets how bad it is helps.

HOPE FAITH AND CHARITY. Hope this to will pass, faith in a higher power to get me through the darkest hours, and charity, acts of random kindness which make me feel better. Yesterday I saw a guy with a hatchback which no longer stayed up trying to load his car at Lowes, I held the hatch up. When I am feeling bad I think of a friend who is sick and call to only ask how they are.

Alex

  

[Ufrustrated2]

a BIG Amen to this from Linda, "But. I can't even understand this disease, ..."!

count me as one with up and down emotions over the years. i always associated with how i was feeling physically. yet, sometimes that was not the case. get blue for no reason, and for me that just made the frustration worse...because for one, i had no clue what was going on. but i know now!

hang in there ...

[truelove47]

PastorDan
Just seeing your name helped me.    I do have strong FAITH.  Your messag means a lot

Thank you                         You are special too   Please be well               Linda

[PastorDan]

You bet we're special, and don't you forget it!

[truelove47]

Sally
Thanks,for your support. Now i know.a little more from quix.My  friends, i feel, don't understand because i appear to be a happy go lucky person and they actually think i have a secret to life.(I wish I did)  I really don't complain because it opens a big door that I chose to keep closed. The old story is if you look ok, How can you be sick?

People who are not going thru this stinker I feel don't understand, But. I can't even understand this disease, so how can they?  We are mighty special, LOL.arent we??

Thank you again, it means a lot                              Be well           Linda

[truelove47]

Quix;   from Linda   and Thank you    Am OK and now understand more

I read the med articles and they make perfect sense.  I am married 43 years to my childhood sweetheat.  He is  my everything)  He has stood by me thru the the best and worse of times.
breast cancer,ms. always there for me in every way shape and form.  Two adult children (a molecular cell biologist,my daughter) and a son (an engineer) 5 beautiful loving grandchildren,I have been blessed in so many ways. I guess thats why I don't understand
I can't take negativity at all People love to dump on me because i appear to be so level headed.I am really not. I am super  fragile, but play the strong person Be well Linda

[Salamander2]

Yes, yes, yes.  Everything you say sounds so familiar.  There have been days when I don't feel up to going to work.  I have called in sick when I was actually depressed.  So I totally understand where you are.  My Neuro changed my meds a couple of months back and generally I feel better, but still get those overwhelming feelings of sadness.
I decided this is just another aspect of the illness and not really anything that is wrong or bad in my life (aside from MS).  
By the way,  you DO have a reason to be sad.  Try to get support from family and friends, maybe find one particular person you can confide in and share your feelings. Hang in and hopefully your Neuro will have a suggestion.
Sally

[Quixotic1]

Hi, there, again!  Linda, it sounds like your depression may be worsening.  It is not uncommon for depression to manifest itself in rapid swings up and down and to be overcome by those horrible blankets of feeling sad and futile and unable to move forward.

You likely already know that MS plays nasty games with our emotions.  Because it is also a disease of the gray matter and of the brainstem, we are often at the mercy of emotions.

Depending on how bad you are feeling, it may or may not be alright to wait for 10 days to see your neuro.  If the feelings are getting worse really fast, then put in a call to your neuro tomorrow and let him know how you are feeling.  He may want to see you, or get you on an increased dose of the antidepressant before he sees you.  But, he can't decide this if he doesn't know what is going on.

And remember, we aren't "the outside world."  So, let us know how you are feeling.  and I mean "say real words to us."  Tell us your fears and why you're sad and all.  It's the best part about an anonymous forum.  But, sometimes, isolating your feelings from those around you (not us) is not a great idea.  We cope much more poorly when we don't have a clued-in support network.

Depression is one of the more serious effects of MS and it is not a side effect.  It is a primary effect of the disease just like weakness and pain.

Do you live alone?

Here is some reading if you haven't seen it yet:

Depression and MS

http://www.medhelp.org/health_pages/Multiple%20Sclerosis/Depression-and-MS/show/752?cid=36

Emotions and MS

http://www.medhelp.org/health_pages/Multiple%20Sclerosis/Emotions-and-MS/show/753?cid=36

Take care and let us help.  'Kay?

Mama Quix