Denial of disorder

[nid087]

I have question related to my mother's health she is 52years old, over the years having had quite a socially islolated, financially unstable and strained married life, she has developed various kinds of phobias, most of which being fear of dieing or being framed mentally unhealthy.She has lost faith in everybody in our family , is absolutely stubborn and resists any change at home, keeps herself confined indoors and in dark as fears there are people outside watching,previously she used to voice these fears now she is convinced we either dont care or do not understand or are  part of the clan trying to do her harm, perhaps also has either hallucinations or false beliefs of hearing voices or self assumed notions of how everyone around is plotting against her. She refuses to acknowledge there is any problem with her health that needs help or cure, as family its very heart breaking and we are deeply concerned for her health and want to help, she keeps chanting prayers as that seems to be only factor she feels would save her,still when asked she denies there is any thing wrong or bothering her as she has lost faith we mean any good or can help, or is perhaps scared not only for life but also fear of losing property,wealth social security. Please suggest what should we do in our outlook towards her to make her have faith , to soften her over anxious and guardedness and what could be the possible diagnosis and cure of her mental-emotional health,how can we convince her for any medical treatment?

[JGF25]

To be honest, the behavioral tactics have to be done by your mother.  They are not something you can help with per se.  There are breathing techniques for when she is anxious that she can use to calm herself down.  If you think she will do it then this is what you do.

She take a deep breath in through her mouth, holds it for 5 seconds and she counts this out in her head, and then she lets it all out through her mouth.  You have to do this until you get your rapid heart beat back down.  

If she is not going outside, then you can try to reassure her that nobody is watching her and maybe get her to put one foot on the porch, then the next day two, etc. until she can get all the way on the front porch without fear.  Maybe she can realize that since nothing happened the last time she put a foot or two on the porch, maybe she will come to realize that it is okay and not be anxious about it.  

Really though, and I know it is not an option, she needs to see a doctor.  There are plenty of books out there but they all hinge on the "patient" being a self-advocate for themselves with the verbal support of family members.  Is the family doctor aware of this?  Perhaps you could give him/her a call and discuss what to do next.  

Good luck.  

[nid087]

thnx for the reply JGF25 , if you know are there any non-medicinal but behavioural tactics that rest of the family could use to may b help reduce her anxiety..

[JGF25]

Hi there.  It sounds to me that your mother is suffering from perhaps both OCD and generalized anxiety but I'm not a physician so don't take my opinion and run with it.  There is definitely something going on with her mental health.  

She really needs to see a therapist but I know that will be hard to get her to agree to.  So the next best starting place is her regular doctor.  Can you get her to go and see him/her even under the pretence of a yearly physical?  That way, you can alert the doctor ahead of time about what has been going on.  Your mother will obviously deny everything so this way the doctor knows and can address the problem even if your mother sits there and says nothing is wrong.  

When people start having irrational thoughts, it is really hard for them to get out of the cycle even with you trying to help her.  The despair can become overwhelming.  That is why she really needs to see a doctor.  

I'm sorry I cannot be of more help to you.  

[nid087]

just to add she also has felt many times electric shock waves traveling through her body, which i feel could be due to poor health due to extreme stress and depleted muscle and fat content perhaps around nerves, would really appreciate any diagnosis and cure suggestions,thnx