I am concerned about some of my husband's behaviors. He has always "obsessed" about things, been afraid everything would go wrong and take all the blame upon himself. He doubts everything, second guesses himself all the time, and puts together spreadsheets and repeats conversations about minute details of things - like which tv to buy or phone company to use. He even gets paralyzed at the grocery store if I put something unfamiliar, but general on the list, such as microwave popcorn. (Butter, no butter, salt, lightly salted, low fat, what brand) and will sit there and stare at it all for 20 minutes and then finally call me because he cannot make the decision. He gets anxious about the tiniest things.
Is this a type of obsessive behavior? I have tried talking to him about it but he gets very defensive. Part of the issue I have with this is that I have been in treatment for depression for several years, am on medication, and with this type of behavior I start to think I can't possible make a good, right decision about anything and then I feel myself spiraling into the "I'm worthless, why bother" mentality. I have upped my medication, but don't want to be a zombie with it. I also don't think it's fair if he won't try to correct his behavior when I am trying my hardest to correct mine (I let him know when I'm having "rough days" so he doesn't think it's because of anything he has said or done, etc.)
Has anyone had success dealing with broaching the subject? I don't want to hurt his feelings, but I end up shutting down when he behaves this way and then it's only worse when he obsesses about what he's done wrong, then gets in my face more, and it's a whole aweful cycle. Any suggestions would be appreciated.